Captivated Bride

Another Change

2010-01-02T10:29:00.002-06:00

It's been some time since I've checked this blogspot. For the latest in my world, you can read http://lifemoreorless.wordpress.com!

I've Moved!

2009-07-13T17:32:00.001-05:00

Check out new posts on http://captivatedbride.wordpress.com. There's too many posts to move them all to the new site, so the entire library will remain here. Thanks!!!

Faith and Folly

2009-07-11T10:05:00.007-05:00

Once again and probably not for the last time, God has moved in my life and in the life of my husband to sovereignly close doors we thought He had opened; truthfully, that we hoped we could walk through. The fact that the doors not only closed, but seemed to slam shut, makes for a time of reflection and deep consideration of what God is really doing in our lives, clearly something different than we had anticipated and imagined.

When God acts in our lives against what we expect, we know it isn't because of any imperfection in Him or His purposes or plan. But, we can be certain that there is always the possibility that we have erred in some way, lacked discernment or simply taken our eyes off Him for a second, lost our footing and stumbled. It happens. We're all still learning and there will be bumps and bruises in the process. We are being perfected, but for now, we are far from perfect!

Even as we stumble, I believe God is pleased with our desire to please Him. And if He recognizes even an inkling of sincerity in our hearts to follow His will above our own, He will show His great love for us by refusing to give us anything that might detract from our utter dependence upon Him.

When, in our weakness, we begin to fall into the subtle trap of worldly wisdom, He will protect us, albeit sometimes painfully, by cutting us off and drawing us once again to surrender.

Paul tells the Corinthians in his first letter, "Has not God shown up the nonsense and the folly of this world's wisdom?" And he reminds them that though it may be filled with many great philosophies about how to get along in and manage life, "the world with all its earthly wisdom failed to perceive and recognize and know God" (v. 20-21).

My prayer is that I will not resist God's hand in my life. There seem to be more secure ways to live by the world's standard, but I acknowledge the folly of that security and long for God to protect me from ever being in a place where I fail to perceive and recognize and know Him. Sometimes His hand comes toward me as if to strike, only to set itself around me like a shield.

Made Woman

2009-07-05T17:34:00.002-05:00

Not every girl is attracted to the mobster type, but I happen to hold a fascination for them. A few years ago, I was completely addicted to The Sopranos, which at least helps explain why our family has a 16 ½ pound orange tabby named Vito.

In the mob, the whole idea is to become a “made man,” which basically means you’re in, and somebody always has your back, and if you get in dire straits, somebody will bail you out. It’s a coveted position, and guys will go to great lengths, if you know what I mean, to get made.

I have to admit that in my own life, even just watching mob movies and series dramas, I recognize the longing to belong to something bigger, to feel like I have somebody watching out for me, and to know that in a tough situation, there’s somebody else willing to go the distance on my behalf -- even if it is just because of the profit margin.

There’s not an air-tight spiritual correlation, at least I don’t think there is, but I imagine myself as a “made woman.” I mean, I really can’t think of a more powerful head of the family than my Father! And the beautiful part is that I don’t have to do anything crazy or illegal to gain full access to the rights and privileges of His Family.

I need to be reminded of that on a regular basis, because in my life -- I don‘t know about yours -- there are way too many shocks and surprises. Just when I think I know up from down, the whole plane flips.

And I can easily find myself in a downward spiral wondering how exactly I’m going to make it. Then, it hits me . . . I’m not. I’m not going to make it. But, God is going to make me. And in the process, He’s going to provide absolutely everything needed -- provision and protection and peace and on and on.

In his song Your Love is Strong, Jon Foreman sings, “So why do I worry? Why do I freak out? God knows what I need.” I find myself listening to that over and over these days. And it reminds me that when I was younger, there was an older man in the church we attended that loved on Sunday nights during our church wide dinner to get up on the little stage in the fellowship hall and sing His Eye is on the Sparrow.

He knew something from all his years on earth about trusting in God alone, and it’s something I want to know. Because I have an inkling that being “made” in God is the closest thing to heaven on earth we’ll ever find. It’s a secret known by the birds and the lilies and old men who’ve walked thousands of miles on their knees:

Why should I feel discouraged, why should the shadows come,
Why should my heart be lonely, and long for heaven and home,
When Jesus is my portion? My constant friend is He:
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

I sing because I’m happy,I sing because I’m free,
For His eye is on the sparrow,And I know He watches me.

“Let not your heart be troubled,” His tender word I hear,
And resting on His goodness, I lose my doubts and fears;
Though by the path He leadeth, but one step I may see;
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Whenever I am tempted, whenever clouds arise,
When songs give place to sighing, when hope within me dies,
I draw the closer to Him, from care He sets me free;
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Get Ready

2009-07-01T10:48:00.003-05:00

As a mother, a lot of interactions with my children give insight into my interaction with God. One of the latest is my older daughter's obsession with "when" things are going to happen. For example, on any given day this summer, we are likely to have some sort of activity planned.

I might make plans for us to go to a friend's house to swim. So, some time prior to leaving our house, I ask the girls to get their bathing suits on, find their flip flops and towels, brush their hair, etc. But before any of those things are actually done, Anna is standing next to me asking, "What time are we going to go?"

And I respond, as I almost always do, "Don't worry about what time, just do what I've asked you to do. Then, we it's time, you'll be ready, and we'll go."

For Anna, the question of when something is going to happen seems more important than the little commands I've asked her to obey, because in her mind she's thinking, "What's the point of getting my swimsuit on and finding my towel, if I don't know for sure that I'll end up getting to swim?"

I may not like it, but I do the same thing with God. Thinking regularly, "What does all this little day to day stuff of obedience matter if it isn't going to eventually be about something larger and more worthwhile. How can I be sure all of my actions taken in faith will be worth it? When will I arrive at the destination?"

Yet, God responds to me the way I respond to my daughter, "Just obey. Then, when it's time, according to My plan and purpose, you'll be ready."

So I have to model what I expect of my own daughter. I listen to God's leading and directions. I choose to obey, even when the timing of what's ahead remains a mystery. And I believe that in His love for me, He will follow through. And it will be worth it!

Why We Go

2009-06-21T13:32:00.002-05:00

So this entry is at least partially stolen from -- sounds much better to say "inspired by" -- the sermon I heard this morning. The question that needs to be asked today, or at least was asked by my priest is, "Why do we go?" As in, why do we get up every Sunday and make our way to worship when there are so many other things that compete for our time and attention?

Clearly, the world is chasing any number of pursuits that in no way involve a church building, a body of believers and the gospel. And even many of those who once darkened the doors of the sanctuary have since turned away to invest themselves somewhere else.

Statistics paint a grim picture of declining attendance and the cynics tell us that while people aren't coming much now, the trend shows that they'll continue to come less and less unless something changes.

The modern church is putting effort into reversing the cycle. Unfortunately, its efforts to present itself as more relevant to the culture can have dangerous side effects . . . like surrendering the battle to get people to adapt their lives to the holiness and sanctity of God in order to, in practice if not in belief, adapt God to suit the state of the people.

In this light, why do those of us who continue to be faithful, continue? Certainly our primary concern cannot be simply to maintain viable community, although community is necessary to the life offered in Christ -- "Christianity is about personal relationship, but it is not a private relationship," as I've heard it said.

I would argue that our goal is the pleasure of God, and in walking in faithfulness and consistency to offer our lives for His pleasure, we amazingly find our pleasure, our wholeness.

As we continue in obedience to go . . . our proclamation becomes that there is One who died in love for us all, and to live in response to and empowered by that Resurrection love, we find the deepest joy, peace, rest and purpose available to the human heart.

To me, this is salvation that transforms here and now, rather than there and later (although, it does that, too). And this is hope for the lost, the least and the longing. We go so that our lives might become signs to direct them. May they come. May they come back.

Preferential Treatment

2009-06-16T12:26:00.002-05:00

"My dear brothers and sisters, how can you claim to have faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ if you favor some people over others?" (James 2:1)

Recently in a small group meeting, we discussed the early verses of the second chapter of James and all of the ways we show preferential treatment towards certain people. The Bible tells us clearly that if we have God's heart for others, we will not distinguish between rich and poor, attractive and unattractive or young and old. We will not seek relationship only with those that have the same skincolor as we do, root for the same sports team or speak with the same accent.

But, as I've pondered my personal tendencies to "prefer" one person over another, I've come to realize that my actions are often based on something deeper and, I think, darker. Left to my own doing, I am naturally (as in sin-nature) inclined to surround myself with only those people that feed and support my personal sense of rightness, well-being and ease.

I may not recognize it immediately as I survey my closest relationships, but if I look with a more critical eye, it becomes apparent that those I allow into my innermost circle generally serve to benefit me in some way, reinforce my lifestyle and beliefs, appease my ego and satisfy personal needs.

Granted, it is not inherently bad that marriage relationships and close friendships will provide a sense of belonging and of being understood and supported and accepted. But, don't we miss a greater call and purpose in relationship if we always keep at arms distance (at best) those that challenge our ways of thinking, those that might require significant sacrifice from us or those with whom it seems hardest to find common ground?

I recently finished what I now consider one of the top books I've ever read, Same Kind Of Different As Me, and because it is a true story, it opened my eyes in a new way to the depth of connection possible between people from seemingly opposite walks of life. And I am convinced that we really sell ourselves and others short in the way we usually pick and choose our relationships. I think that is at least part of the reason God considers partiality a sin (James 2:9). It cuts short the work His heart longs to do in us through those we least expect.

Never Too Much

2009-06-12T14:31:00.002-05:00

Everyone knows the old cliche that it's possible to get too much of a good thing, and that perhaps too much makes a good thing bad. But in the case of prophetic confirmation, I don't think there's any such thing as "too much"!

My husband has been jumping through hoops for a number of weeks, following the application process for a new job. In light of my plans to follow God's lead into nursing school in the fall, this job would be a source of tremendous financial provision for our family, and we have felt His hand on this process from the beginning.

There have been several prophetic words spoken about God's provision for us and my husband being given this job, and we have received these words confidently. In addition, I have heard a verse repeating in my heart over the last few days. It is one that I discovered last fall when we were waiting in dependence on God for our old house to sell so that we could move to a new school zone and into a more budget-friendly home.

Today, as I sat in the den of our new home, I read my One Year Bible and the Psalm repeated again from the page in black and white: "I am counting on the Lord; yes, I am counting on Him. I have put my hope in His word." (130:5)

God is telling me something about His faithfulness to come through for us . . . He has done it so many times in the past, and I know that He is doing it again. Yes and A-men.

Just A Thought

2009-05-09T10:59:00.003-05:00

I have to wonder sometimes how many of my Christian brothers and sisters are running the treadmill of the life of faith because somewhere along the road, a well-meaning author, pastor, friend or radio talk-show host made them feel like they just "had to keep going."

It's so easy to be drawn into a set of beliefs that says the only way you can be a "real" Christian and get any benefit out of your spiritual walk is if you never say "No." Buck up, take a deep breath, keep chugging, don't give up now . . . you're almost there.

Good grief. I get worn out just thinking about it. And I'm utterly convinced that Jesus never intended anything of the sort for his followers. Obedience, yes. Exhaustion, no. Will he fill us and enable us to complete ever task he sets before us, yes. Will he come to our aid in our weak flesh and make us strong to walk in his calling, yes. Is every thing set before us his calling and his task for us, no. I say again, no.

On one hand, it could be considered encouragement to tell another . . . "keep going" . . . and somtimes it is, and it is needed. But I'm wary of a tactic used by some to offer encouragement (truly, admonition) that is really a disguised method of "tisking" the believer who fails to adhere to silent rules and demands.

There are times to sit down, to prop your feet up, to take a nap. There are times to have a quiet evening with your family instead of piling up in a car and driving to a church event. There are times to realize that the urge to slow down is really a deception of the Evil One to keep you from simple obedience, but failure to act (saying "no" or maybe just "not now") isn't automatically and absolutely disobedience. Discernment is key.

I pray God always leads me in this delicate balance. There's potential to become dull to his nudges and just as great a potential to run myself in the ground because I want those around me to think I'm toeing the line -- which is merely conformity and doesn't please Christ in the least.

Confirmation

2009-05-04T06:07:00.002-05:00

I've learned that in my own life, God uses one particular method of confirmation a lot: repetition. First I think I begin to discern a message in prayer time, then I might come across a Scripture that speaks to that very idea, then I might hear a radio pastor give a sermon on that topic or I'll run across an author that emphasizes the same idea.

It has been true again in my life again in recent weeks. The resounding sense that God is saying, "Too many and too often My children are focused on things that don't really matter. They are caught up in distracting details instead of being caught up in Me. And in that distraction, they miss the Joy that can both set them on fire and set them free."

So when I ran across a book for 50 cents at a garage sale titled, Pleasures Evermore, I knew it wasn't a coincidence.

Sam Storms pretty much sums it up for me:

"I seriously doubt that [any of] the theological traditions or denominational persuasions [represented in Christendom today] . . . are characterized by noticeably less scandalous sin [or are 'significantly more righteous'] than any other . . . Is there no way at all to increase and deepen and expand the transformation of our hearts? Is there anything that will effectively energize the human heart in its war with sin? Just how to we grow in grace and the power to say No to the world, the flesh, and the Devil?

I'm convinced that we have only two options. Either we can devote ourselves and our time and our energy to demonstrating the ugliness and futility of sin and the world, hoping such will embolden our hearts to say No to it as unworthy or our affection, or we can demonstrate the beauty and splendor of all that God is for us in Jesus and become happily and joyfully enticed by a rival affection."

Formulas and Faith

2009-04-26T08:47:00.008-05:00

Over twenty-five years into my walk of faith, I've had a realization that the thing I most dread ever becoming or most regret that I may have ever been is a formulaic Christian. A+B=C. Just combine this (A)ttitude with this (B)ehavior, and you are in the (C)lub, you can call yourself a (C)hristian. The cruel caveat is that whichever formula you determine to apply will only work within a specific group.

And while it will certainly help you qualify for one community, you'll be instantly disqualified for another. The group for which you qualify will pat you on the back, while the groups for which you don't will condescendingly try to "convert" you, talk about the falsity of your faith behind your back or refuse your company altogether. What a farse!

I'm not proud to admit it, but I've bought into my share of formulas. I've relished being "in" with those that agreed with my formula, and I've judged anyone who was "out." There was a time when I frowned upon a lot of evangelicals for their lists of don'ts without being willing to recognize that some traditionalists just replace the don'ts with dos and in either case, faith can become nothing more than a game with strict rules.

Sadly, it doesn't stop with the concrete lines dividing denominations. There are innumerable sub-groups of Christians who make up their own additional codes of conduct to define being an authentic Christian, and these are unmercifully enforced.

It's disturbing, destructive and disheartening.

In any form, legalism usurps God and seeks to set a man-standard of how to get to God and who is right with Him.

Whether it's based on decided good things people should do or declared bad things they should refrain from doing, the whole point it to exclude and condemn those who fall outside the designated parameters.

It decrees that God only loves those who measure up to set forth criteria and all others are knowingly or unknowingly condemned. And generally, those in one group believe those outside their group deserve such judgment.

Have we lost our minds? No. I think our minds work all too well. I think we have lost our hearts.

Why do we continue to make and adhere to lists and formulas? Traumatically slicing and dicing ourselves and others with a cookie-cutter approach to faith is not Christianity. It's not even living.

" . . . incessant and exclusive moralizing reduces the Good News to a tedious behavioral code, a rigid ethic, or an altruistic philosophy of life" (Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust)

It's robotic religion, not freedom in faith. There's no awe, no wonder, no open space to receive and relish life as it is given. There's not even air to breathe.

"Any attempt to measure the value of our lives by comparison and contrast to others belittles our gifts and dishonors God by our ungratefulness. As an old black preacher on a red-clay road in Georgia instructed a pilgrim, 'Be who you is, 'cause if you ain't who you is, you is who you ain't'" (Manning). And that's an utterly suffocating place to be.

But while legalism is a self-constructed prison, there is a door to freedom:

"Guard and keep yourselves in the love of God; expect and patiently wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ [which will bring you] unto life eternal" (Jude 1:21, AMP).

And as you open your heart and your life and you take in deep the fresh air . . . be ready for those who will not understand and will not let you easily embrace your freedom . . .

"Refute [so as to convict] some who dispute with you, and on some have mercy" as you have been shown "who waver and doubt" (Jude 1:22). For they live in timidity and trembling who continue to bear any weight of earning the eternal blessing and favor of God which by trust alone in Christ can be received.

Thanks

2009-04-24T17:03:00.004-05:00

"To be grateful for an unanswered prayer, to give thanks in a state of interior desolation, to trust in the love of God in the face of marvels, cruel circumstances, obscenities, and commonplaces of life is to whisper a doxology in darkness."

- Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust

Lessons Learned This Week (So Far!)

2009-04-22T16:21:00.004-05:00

I don’t know nearly enough about how to live grace, but I am desperate to grow in this area. So, Charles Swindoll is graciously teaching me through The Grace Awakening.

Here are a few highlights:

1. There is such a thing as cheap grace. And I have generally believed that I had to be oh so careful because I might fall into the trap of making grace cheap. I have tended to follow a line of thinking that it would be better to err toward legalism than to err toward abusing grace. I'm not sure I will do that anymore. As in all things, balance is necessary. I'm coming to believe that it's probably most important to realize that fear of cheap grace can rob from us the joy of the freedom offered in Christ by true grace. And if that occurs, His sacrifice to offer us "abundant life" was made in vain.

“’Cheap grace’ justifies the sin rather than the sinner. True grace, on the other hand, justifies the sinner, not the sin. Let me encourage you not to be afraid of true grace because some have misrepresented it as cheap grace.”

2. Eugene Peterson:

“The word Christian means different things to different people. To one person it means a stiff, uptight, inflexible way of life, colorless and unbending. To another it means a risky, surprise-filled venture, lived on tiptoe at the edge of expectation.”

Which do you prefer?

“If we get our information from the biblical material, there is no doubt that the Christian life is a dancing, leaping, daring life.”

3. Yet legalism abounds in the church. Perhaps now more than ever. Perhaps simply as much as always. Regardless, as Peterson asserts, “ . . . the very place where we are most likely to experience the free life, is also the very place where we are in most danger of losing it.”

J.B. Phillips sharply paraphrases Paul’s words to the legalists in Galatia (Chapter 3:1-3):

“O you dear idiots of Galatia, who saw Jesus Christ the crucified so plainly, who has been casting a spell over you? I shall ask you one simple question: Did you receive the Spirit of God by trying to keep the Law or by believing the message of the Gospel? Surely you can’t be so idiotic as to think that a man begins his spiritual life in the Spirit and then completes it by reverting to outward observances?”

4. Break-ups and broken bonds aren’t always bad (look at Paul and Barnabas):

“Disagreements prompt fresh starts, new works, broader visions. The event that caused it to happen isn’t good. It is more like a rock hitting a placid lake, creating a sudden wake where there are hurt feelings, at least initially. But the ripples continue on until people are greathearted enough to forget the pain and stop licking their wounds and proceed into new directions . . . We need to be people who can disagree in grace and then press on, even if the disagreement leads to a separation.”

5. One of the hardest things we can do as Christians, with unbelievers, but probably more importantly and more difficultly with fellow believers, is let go:

To let go doesn’t mean to stop caring,
It means I can’t do it for someone else
To let go is not to cut myself off,
It’s the realization that I can’t control another.
To let go is not to enable,
But to allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness,
Which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try to change or blame another,
I can only change myself.
To let go is not to care for,
But to care about.
To let go is not to fix,
But to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge,
But to allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes,
But to allow others to effect their own outcomes.
To let go is not to be protective;
It is to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny,
But to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold, or argue,
But to search out my own shortcomings and to correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires,
But to take each day as it comes.
To let go is not to criticize and regulate anyone,
But to try to become what I dream I can be.
To let go is not to regret the past,
But to grow and live for the future.
To let go is to fear less and love more!

American Attitude Adjustment

2009-04-05T15:39:00.006-05:00

John Piper has had some words for me lately. Actually, God has had some words for me and He used John Piper to relay the message through his book Don't Waste Your Life. It confirms that sneaky suspicion I've had for a very long time, the one that inspired this blog: The average American/Western Christian is way off the mark.

At our best, we've bought into a mentality that if we just spend enough time at home with our families, (somewhat) carefully manage our media and, at least for most of the church, avoid alcohol and anything considered "loose living," we can pat ourselves on the back and go on our way. The world will be utterly amazed at how "different" we are and like magnets, without ever saying a word, we'll attract sinners to Christ by the day.

So, how's that workin' for ya?

It hasn't taken many pages of Piper's book for me to once again conclude, we are seriously disturbed and lethally mistaken.

[There are moments], when the trifling fog of life clears and I see what I am really on earth to do, I groan over the petty pursuits that waste so many lives - and so much of mine. Just think of the magnitude of sports - a whole section of the daily newspaper. But there is no section on God. Think of the endless resources for making your home and garden more comfortable and impressive. Think of how many tens of thousands of dollars you can spend to buy more car than you need. Think of the time and energy and conversation that go into entertainment and leisure and what we call "fun stuff." And add to that now the computer that artificially recreates the very games that are already so distant from reality; it is like a multi-layered dreamworld of insignificance expanding into nothingness.

The sermon in our church today was on having the attitude of Christ and pulled from Philipians 2:2,5, and 8. As I sat and listened, I journaled the following (in quotations):

"We need the 'attitude and purpose and (humble) mind' of Christ."

I've always thought somehow that was about me carrying my cross the way that Christ humbled himself to The Cross and bore it according to God's will and design, and usually that conjured a great deal of pain and unhappiness . . . "martyr syndrome"! But today, something else was stirred in my heart about being conformed to the image of Christ:

"We can never really carry The Cross (seems like foolishness to consider that we might - He carried it expressly because we couldn't and can't). Jesus did it, only Jesus could do it; only Jesus is worthy of the task. The utmost we can do is let the truth of The Cross bear down on us and so press into us that we are permeated with it and it oozes out of us as a grateful heart, a contrite spirit and extravagant love.

If we set ourselves in this way to The Cross, we will never have to ask, 'What is it Lord that you desire me to do (or not to do)?' and we will not have to strive for oneness in the body of believers. As individuals, we will be about the business of glorifying and magnifying Christ in all things, and we will collectively be 'one in purpose, having the same love, being in full accord and of one harmonious mind and intention' (Philipians 2:2)."

What the world should be drawn to is the magnified Christ in us, expressed in the effusive joy of His disciples. But where is that joy in the American church? Do you honestly see it? It's better than Gatorade. Is it in you?

"Shouldn't we ultimately come to a place where ALL things truly lose ALL value and worth in our hearts and minds (when compared to the banner over our lives which is The Cross), so that we cling solely to Christ (crucified), and in that grasp we hold onto and are captive to joy (deep eternal joy). We put ourselves so often in position to lose joy because we still find it, try to find it, outside of The Cross."

Child of Light

2009-04-04T11:48:00.003-05:00

Those in my women's prayer group already know this post. But, for the rest, I preface by saying that I usually feel like a total cheat when I simply post the wise words of others . . . especially Oswald Chambers because it's just too easy to find meat to chew on in his writings. I'm tempted to change the name of this blog to "My Utmost For His Highest Cut and Pasted."

Nonetheless, I read the following within the past few days, and I haven't been able to shake it. I hope it will send you trembling as well.

If the Spirit of God detects anything in you that is wrong, He doesn't ask you to make it right; He only asks you to accept the light of truth, and then He will make it right. A child of the light will confess sin instantly and stand completely open before God. But a child of the darkness will say, "Oh, I can explain that." When the light shines and the Spirit brings conviction of sin, be a child of the light. Confess your wrongdoing, and God will deal with it. If, however, you try to vindicate yourself, you prove yourself to be a child of the darkness.

A Done Deal

2009-03-31T14:42:00.002-05:00

"It is finished." (John 19:30)

Okay, this may be a stretch. But, it's been fun for me to think about, so I'll share it on the blog.

Yesterday, as we were driving home from her ballet class, Madison (my generally hysterical - read humorous - younger daughter) started repeating over and over in her emphatic little voice, "It's not a deal 'til it's a DUNN deal."

I had to add the DUNN instead of DONE part, because I knew she was simply repeating the catch phrase of a local used automotive dealership. But, it was truly funny nonetheless, and it brought something slightly profound to mind as I thought about it again today, and smiled.

In Christ, we are a DONE DEAL!

John Piper reminded me of that fact just a few days ago, and I think there's a blog about that . . . and yet it's such good news, God let me hear it again. In fact, it came in the sermon from Fr. Mark this weekend, reminding me that the work was accomplished on the cross, which is why we can walk in grace.

What a deal we've been given. Not just any deal, but the greatest deal ever offered mankind!

I hope God keeps giving me opportunity to hear that message, because I personally need the assurance, hope and joy that comes with it.

Granted, there's a ridiculous amount of work yet to be done in me - heart, mind, soul and spirit - but, he is more than able to handle it, I know he will be "faithful and just" to handle it, and I'm humbled by and grateful for such an amazing gift!

I'm smiling again now, not because of what Maddie said or how she said it, but because of the enormous peace packed in the truth of that little catch phrase.

Mushy Truth

2009-03-26T16:14:00.005-05:00

"Where, indeed would any of us be if God's blessing had been withheld till all our notions were right? Every Christian without exception experiences far more in the way of mercy and help than the quality of his notions warrants."
- J.I. Packer, Keep in Step With The Spirit

In the event that I begin to take myself and this blog too seriously, God graciously sends a word my way to make sure I remember that I am always indebted to his mercy as I try to work out my faith.

My heart desperately desires to know truth, but the truth is that sometimes piecing it all together is like trying to tie a knot with an overcooked spaghetti noodle. Everything just kind of pulls apart and turns to mush.

And I think sometimes the hardest surrender for me is the one that requires letting go of the need to completely understand, to fully grasp, to "get it." Instead, God asks me to trust that somehow in ways that I won't even realize and am probably least able to articulate, he is molding and shaping and guiding me to become what he's always desired and designed me to be.

As much as I want to, I won't be able to see the road that he's laid out, the road on which I currently walk, until I've reached the gates of his kingdom. Then, I'll turn around, and the path that has been partly to densely clouded every day of my life on earth, will be spread out behind me plain as day. Proof that my destiny has been certain. Evidence that "haphazard" isn't in my God's vocabulary.

Oh, how I long for that day! And how I long for more grace to let me rest in the One Who Sustains me until then.

Timely Word

2009-03-25T12:55:00.005-05:00

"Fight we must, for only those who persevere will be saved (Mark 13:13). And fight we will, because God is at work in us to will and to do his good pleasure (Phillipians 2:13; Hebrews 13:21)."

- John Piper, Taste And See

I am so grateful when God speaks a word that I need to hear right when I need to hear it. There are certainly times in life when I face what seems to be Divine Silence, but then there are precious moments of clarity when my Lord makes his heart known to me and it brings relief like the first breath after being under water. I know in that moment that I'm going to be okay, that I'm not doing this Christianity thing on my own.

The word I've heard from God over the past few days has been one of much needed grace amid the season of lent, which for me often breeds performance anxiety.

Suddenly, my world feels full of do's and don't's. Specifically, "don't eat dessert!" Of course, that is a "don't" I accepted willingly as an act of sacrifice and denial of self, and God has been good to sustain me. But there is generally a lot more spiritual reflection during this season that leads me to question if I'm doing and not doing what I should be doing and not doing.

Spiritual reflection is necessary and good, and I highly recommend that Christians take spiritual inventory on a regular basis, to allow time and space for God through the Holy Spirit to reveal specific areas of our lives that are not surrendered to his purposes.

Yet, it's also true that reflection can ultimately lead to a sense of failure in faith. Let's face it. There's so much that we do that we really shouldn't, and so much more that we could do or should do, yet we don't or won't. If we read Jesus' teachings with an honest heart, we should go weak in the knees! No one stacks up. Not one.

Praise God that when it all comes down, it's not dependent on me to get this Christianity thing right. The simple fact is that I just can't! More than that, I am not supposed to.

Whatever I set out to accomplish in my faith is ultimately a hindrance to it. Either, I will become enamored with the little bit of guilt-driven progress I achieve with hard-nosed determination, or I will become overwhelmed with despair and doubt because I know that the little bit that I attempt isn't nearly enough.

My eyes shift from Christ to myself. I no longer have time for my relationship with him because I'm spending every second patting myself on the back and watching to see if those around me are impressed, or wallowing in pity and shame and grabbing at others in hopes they can pull me out of the mire.

The moment I forget the truth of myself in light of a holy God and the amazing provision of Christ to bring me into right standing with the Father, I step outside of grace. The very grace by which I am saved AND sanctified. The very grace that brings infinite glory to God and continually reminds me that it is all about him, for nothing good can be accomplished apart from him.

In sweet surrender, my faith must be worked out. And yet, the work is not mine, it's God's.

I personally find the sweetest rest in knowing that. So, you may wonder, does all this grace mean we just throw our hands in the air? Or is there anything for a Christian to do? Yes. Humbly cling - this is where spiritual disciplines come in very handy - to the One who can and will work through your surrender to glorify himself and bring you fully sanctified into the everlasting joy of eternity.

I am particularly fond of how Oswald Chambers explains:

"If my holiness is not drawing others to him, it is not the right kind of holiness . . . Others will be left with this thought - 'What a fine person that man is!' That is not being a true 'friend of the bridegroom' - I am increasing all the time; he is not . . . we have to be more careful to have the moral and vital relationship to him above everything else, including obedience . . . most of our life is not spent in trying to be consciously obedient, but in maintaining this relationship."

A Prayer For The Church

2009-03-21T21:54:00.003-05:00

Oh, Lord, by the truth of your Word, and the power of your Spirit and the ministry of your body, build men and women in your Church. . . .
who don’t love the world more than God,
who don’t care if they make much money,
who don’t care if they own a house,
who don’t care if they have a new car or two cars,
who don’t need recent styles,
who don’t care if they get famous,
who don’t miss steak or fancy fare,
who don’t expect that life should be comfortable and easy,
who don’t feed their minds on TV each night,
who don’t measure truth with their finger in the wind,
who don’t get paralyzed by others’ disapproval,
who don’t return evil for evil,
who don’t hold grudges,
who don’t gossip,
who don’t twist the truth,
who don’t brag or boast,
who don’t whine or use body language to get pity,
who don’t criticize more than praise,
who don’t hang out in cliques,
who don’t eat too much or exercise too little;
But
who are ablaze for God
who are utterly God-besotted,
who are filled with the Holy Spirit,
who strive to know the height and depth of Christ’s love,
who are crucified to the world and dead to sin,
who are purified by the Word and addicted to righteousness,
who are mighty in memorizing and using the Scriptures,
who keep the Lord’s Day holy and refreshing,
who are broken by the consciousness of sin,
who are thrilled by the wonder of free grace,
who are stunned into humble silence by the riches of God’s glory,
who are persevering constantly in prayer,
who are ruthless in self-denial,
who are fearless in public witness to Christ’s lordship,
who are able to unmask error and blow away doctrinal haze,
who are tough in standing for the truth,
who are tender in touching hurting people,
who are passionate about reaching peoples who have no church,
who are pro-life for the sake of babies and moms and dads and the glory of God,
who are keepers of all their promises, including marriage vows,
who are content with what they have and trusting the promises of God,
who are patient and kind and meek when life is hard.

- From John Piper's Taste and See

God's Plan

2009-03-15T07:56:00.004-05:00

"God's will is the best for me, though rarely the easiest."
- Philip Yancey

In Jeremiah 29:11, God declares one of his sweetest promises: “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” But he also prefaces this promise by telling his people to put down roots where they have been placed, to work with their circumstances, if you will, and to obediently and passionately seek him before he will fulfill their destiny.

So often we are sidetracked by plans and schemes. We believe we see a glimpse of what God’s bigger picture might be, and we rush to get a better view, or we sit around anxiously awaiting further revelation or tediously second-guessing every detail of our lives, and even the lives of those around us, to see if it is matching up with what we thought we saw.

Ultimately, we end up completely off-course and totally ineffective in our faith because everything is suddenly dependent on the “vision.” And like anything else that steals our passion for Christ Himself, it becomes an idol to us, an end unto itself, and we find that we cannot be satisfied or joyful unless that vision is realized.

God makes it clear in Jeremiah that he will be found by his people only when they want him above everything. Above whether they have good friends or walk alone, whether they and their families are healthy or in and out of the hospital, whether they have filet mignon on the table or white rice, whether their days are filled with laughter or tears, whether they can pay the mortgage or lose their house, whether they find employment or face layoffs, whether the church building is overflowing with people or it and the offering plate are empty.

He tells us that his plan requires a set amount of time to be prepared -- time which he alone can measure -- and he will show up in perfect time and “not a day before” (The Message). Yet, we are all to quick to grow impatient and incredulously demand that God show up on our schedule. We speak and pray as if it is possible to twist his arm if only we are emphatic enough.

We want gratification, release from the difficulties and disappointments of this life. We do not want to be holy. We want to be happy.

But this is distrust at its apex. To be uneasy unless God moves as we would like when we would like. This is certainly not the walk of faith lived by Christ as he surrendered moment by moment to the will of his Father even unto an unimaginably cruel death -- the antithesis of what he as the Son of God, the King of kings justly deserved.

And until we can live as Christ, able to weep but also to celebrate, acquainted with sorrow but a beacon of true joy, in utter submission to the Father . . . until we know that we are held in the very palm of his hand both today and forever despite the world seeming to crumble around us . . . until we can find rest and peace in his care and in his truth . . . we have no light to offer a dark and dying world. We have no hope to share with those who are perishing. For we ourselves are not walking in the light of Life.

Road to Emmaus

2009-03-08T14:31:00.002-05:00

"As they talked and discussed these things, Jesus himself suddenly came and began walking with them." (Luke 24:15)

It strikes me first as funny that Cleopas and his unnamed friend and fellow follower of Jesus didn't think much of this man that suddenly appeared among them on their way to Emmaus. How he managed to be caught up with them is not exactly explained in Scripture. Yet, they don't seem the least bit surprised or taken aback at his presence.

But it strikes me second as very disturbing because their reaction is a portrait of ourselves and our nonchalance at Jesus' arrival on the scene in our own lives. Like our Biblical brothers, our "eyes are kept from recognizing him," and we don't even realize it is Christ that has appeared.

Yet, as he does in Luke, he does today. He remains patient and engaging. He stays with them until they finally "get it."

And I think it's very important to note that in the process, he asks them to answer questions to which he already knows the answer. The God of the universe, who understands all things from before the foundation of the world humbles himself to simple conversation for the sake of conversation. Why?

Were he to simply walk among us as the know-it-all, he would be distanced from us. But instead, he humbles himself to listen in order to draw us into relationship.

Finally, Jesus' followers were significantly impacted by their meeting with him. But it wasn't until after he was gone that they sensed the depth of the experience and were able to articulate it. Similarly, while the mountain top experiences are vital to our spiritual health and renewal, we are actually most effective in our faith when we come down.

That is when the Spirit comes to us and testifies within us and through us to others the Truth we have known and received in our face to face encounter with Christ.

Powerful Trust

2009-03-03T05:58:00.006-06:00

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. (Mark 11:24)

I've read and heard this verse numerous times as a Christian. It directly follows Jesus' cursing the fig tree and teaching the disciples that they have the power in Him to literally move mountains.

Yet, I know I have personally struggled when it seems the mountains in my life remain mockingly still despite my perseverance in prayer.

Jesus says clearly that the mountains can be moved if there is "no doubt in your heart," so I have generally assumed that when my power is weak, I must be doubting, whether I realize it or not.

But Jesus doesn't stop with faith and doubt. There is a critical verse that closes His teaching . . . "And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses" (Mark 11:26).

It would be easy to say that these verses address two different things: That we have the ability to yield the power of God in our lives if we have solid faith and the reiteration that to be forgiven, we must forgive.

Yet, I believe strongly that Christ is linking these two things together. Not only is our solid faith a prerequisite for God's power in Christ to flow in our lives, but confession of our sinfulness toward God and others must be addressed before God's work through us and for us can be accomplished.

Oswald Chambers says, "God is not actively involved with our natural life as long as we continue to pamper and gratify it . . . " One way we pamper and gratify ourselves is by giving ourselves permission to be offended by others and to relentlessly hold that offense against them.

Now, we are usually quick to ask ourselves if we are holding doubt in our hearts when we do not receive from God what we ask. We should be just as quick to ask ourselves if there is an unconfessed grudge in our heart toward another.

We simply will not experience the fullness of God's power in our lives -- no matter how determined our faith -- when we are holding unforgiveness in our hearts.

Why? Because at the root, the issue is the same: Do we trust God?

When we have doubt in His power, we show distrust in His ability to do this or that in our lives and we show that we do not really believe "all things are possible." When we hold unforgiveness and grudges towards others, we show our distrust in His ability to deal with the people who have wronged us and caused us pain and we show that we do not consider Him the "righteous Judge."

When we will "put [our lives] out in the desert" of trust in God alone, "He will . . . fulfill all His promises for the natural" (Oswald Chambers).

Sight

2009-03-02T06:35:00.007-06:00

And Jesus said to him, "What do you want me to do for you?" (Mark 10:51)

Jesus comes to us with the same question. But with what do we respond. We say that we fail to see him at work in our lives. We question whether the impossible is really possible. It seems miracles are for others, but not for us.

Yet when Jesus comes to us and offers to do anything we ask, do we really ask in faith for anything? I believe that while we use the words "I want" in prayer to our Lord, we speak them in doubt. Or we ask for things that aren't central to our wholeness in Christ. Or we speak words as part of the spiritual airs we put on, and they are simply the words we think God or our Christian peers want to hear.

Bartimaeus didn't have spiritual airs. He wasn't interested in jumping through spiritual hoops or going through motions. He didn't have time for that. And he didn't have a laundry list of desires for Christ. Only one thing truly mattered. He couldn't see.

His entire existence was dark, and it was as close to death as he could get and still be breathing. And he knew there was nothing in and of himself that he could do about it. More than that, he knew that if he was given sight, it would be the gift of life itself.

Essentially, Bartimaeus wanted to know himself and the world around him as they really were, not as he had known them or believed them to be. He knew that life was connected to truth, and truth could only be known with sight.

Interestingly enough, when Bartimaeus, in full and honest recognition of his need, cries out to the Lord, those around him tried to shut him up. Did they question Jesus' ability? Were they afraid Jesus would cheat them of their miracle by giving away a bit of his power to Bartimaeus? Were they threatened by Bartimaeus blindness? Did they think he wasn't good enough to receive such a gift from Jesus?

We don't really know. In fact, they hushed Bartimaeus before his request was even spoken. I would offer that perhaps they were more intrigued by Jesus than captivated by Him. They were spectators to His life. They didn't actually want to be participants in it. Like a hungry infant crying in a movie theater, Bartimaeus was interrupting their show.

But Bartimaeus wouldn't be silent, and he asked for the one thing that truly mattered. He asked to see.

Do we know what our blindess is in our own life right now? Do we really believe Jesus will grant us sight if we will only cry out in humility and desperation?

If Bartimaeus had asked for anything else, or if he had followed the lead of the crowd, he would have lived out the rest of his days in debilitating darkness. But because he asked, he "recovered his sight and followed Jesus down the road." (The Message)

For This Purpose

2009-02-22T14:08:00.004-06:00

"For this purpose I was born and for this purpose I have come into the world . . ." (John 18:37)

Jesus was able to say honestly and confidently before Pilate, "For this purpose . . . " And just as He did, so we also should be able to state, to declare those words about our lives. Because we do indeed have a purpose.

Our ultimate purpose is to glorfiy God and bear witness to the Truth of the gospel of Jesus Christ. But in that we also have specific purposes that God desires to work out in our lives daily in what seem to be the meager details of existence.

God has a purpose for our life today just as it is. It is not a purpose that is on hold, for which we wait hopefully or pine impatiently. It is a purpose, a set of purposes which are for now, for this very moment.

Our experience of peace and joy and contentment is dependent upon and determined by whether we recognize and allow to resonate deep within us the truth that we are to grow and sow right where God has planted us at this time in whatever place or state we find ourselves by His sovereign design.

We sometimes wonder how it is that we are to go about the business of death. As Jesus commanded us that we must take up our cross, die to ourselves and follow Him.

I am convinced that death is most effectively carried out when we accept the here and now of our lives, rather than waste hour upon precious hour granted to us to do the work of God by thinking of, wishing for a future that has not yet and may never come to be.

In fact, we must realize that the greatest of what God might do in us simply will not be attained if we are distracted by what is held by tomorrow and known only to God Himself.

It is not that there is no value in listening for God's direction as it may apply to His plans for our future. But we must keep ever in mind the truth of Christ's words that "tomorrow will worry about itself."

If we are obedient unto death, as Christ, even in this day and what God has placed before us in it, there is all certainty that the future in which we will one day find ourselves will be a rich harvest beyond description or expectation.

"We create our own history, day by day, decision by decision, habit by habit."
- Jeff O'Leary

Fellowship

2009-02-04T06:01:00.002-06:00

I've had a few folks ask why I've been "snoozing" at the keyboard over the past couple of months, and I could certainly try to use holidays and moving as easy and valid excuses. But, as it happened again this morning in my quiet time, I've simply found that God's word right now has most often been a reinforcement of the truths He brought home to my heart when I first started this blog.

" . . . there is nothing new under the sun" (Ecclesiastes 1:9).

Rather than let those revelations slip away with time, He continues to bring them back to me as if to say, "You heard me right the first time. This stuff really is the key. Don't let go of it!"

So, this latest post is really just a wonderful excerpt from Roy Hession's tiny but powerful The Calvary Road. Hession lays out better than my blog what is central to true Christian fellowship, and because that has been a topic very close to my heart in recent months, I wanted to share:

We must be willing not only to know, but to be known by him [our fellow man] for what we really are. That means we are not going to hide our inner selves from those with whom we ought to be in fellowship; we are not going to window-dress and put on appearances; nor are we going to whitewash and excuse ourselves. We are going to be honest about ourselves with them. We are willing to give up our spiritual privacy, pocket our pride, and risk our reputations for the sake of being open and transparent with our brethren in Christ. It means, too, that we are not going to cherish any wrong feeling in our hearts about one another, but we are first going to claim deliverance from it from God and put it right with the one concerned. As we walk this way, we shall find that we shall have fellowship with one another at an altogether new level, and we shall not love one another less, but infinitely more.

Desire and Devotion

2009-02-02T06:54:00.004-06:00

"The one passion of Paul's life was to proclaim the gospel of God. He welcomed heartbreak, disillusionment, and tribulation for only one reason -- these things kept him unmovable in his devotion to the gospel of God."

The classic My Utmost For His Highest has become second only to the Bible as a must have and must read often for me in my Christian walk. In a world of "Feel Good, Nearly Everything Goes Christianity," Oswald Chamber's words aren't always comforting or reassuring. They pierce with the weight of Truth, as so many of Christ's words did and do.

As I read the words above this morning, I couldn't help but wonder if any of us carry a desire for the person of God Himself that makes us willing, even eager, as Paul to endure the deepest of trials and despair if it draws us deeper into revelation of our Lord?

A New Resolution

2009-01-26T15:24:00.009-06:00

You will remember your sins and cover your mouth in silence and shame when I forgive you of all that you have done, says the sovereign Lord.

- Ezekiel 16:63

January is a month for resolutions. Lose weight. Stop gossipping. Start having a quiet time. Give more money to the church. Spend extra time with your kids. Read some good books. Read any book.

But this year, I'm making a resolution unlike any other that I can remember making. My resolution is to start living in reality. To recognize the stark and painful truth of the pseudo-life I so easily fall into living and trade it for something incredible and eternal . . . reality in Christ.

"Today, disposable reality eclipses commanding realities that would challenge us as moral agents" (James M. Houston, Joyful Exiles).

The word of the Lord, as I've heard it over and over in recent months amid some hectic holiday celebrating and even more hectic packing and moving and settling into a new home, is about as straightforward as it can get: REPENT, REPENT, REPENT.

Scripture presents the message loud and clear, but when our Bibles are closed, we aren't likely to hear it. And though pastors and priests may urge us from the pulpit, if our hearts are hardened and closed, we are even less likely to receive it.

So, we wallow in ourselves another day, another week, another year. We build an impressive collection of excuses and justifications for every behavior, every routine and every choice in our lives. We glance around at those who live around us and side by side with us day in and day out and we figure that overall we're doing at least as good as, in fact probably better, than they are.

To the outside observer, it appears that everything is under control. And because we do such an effective job of convincing others that we are admirable, we are usually able to convince ourselves in the process as well. But whether we like it or believe it or not, God looks on our hearts, and He isn't even remotely impressed.

"Man is a fallen being . . . gripped by original sin: a creature who produces evil as a bee produces honey" (William Golding).

Yet, in the mercy of God we have one incredible option through repentance for redemption from a neverending cycle of deception and ultimate destruction. And we dismiss it time and again because it requires us to sacrifice something disturbingly precious to us, something many of us seem all to willing to die for . . . our ego.

It's amazing the lengths we'll go to in an attempt to preserve it. In fact, when given the opportunity to choose every day between self and friends, self and faith, self and family or self and Freedom, we choose self hands down every time. Nothing but self is sacred, and left to natural inclinations, we'll protect it at almost any cost.

Sadly, because of this, we live in unreality. We live in a false world where we label ourselves, who we are and what we do, as good and everyone and everything else as bad. We are noble, while all those around us are base and untrustworthy and potentially threatening.

As a result, sometimes without even realizing it, we keep what seems like a safe distance in order to prevent our good selves from being contaminated or disrupted by disappointing people and a distant God. And even when we reach out to those we want to like or love or help, what we give is tainted by our fearful condition.

"You cannot love those you fear. And we are called to love. Be not afraid" (Robert Benson, The Body Broken).

Ultimately, over months and years of life, though we think we have found security in our self-made confine, what we have found is a personal prison from which we can interact with the world only awkwardly and incompletely through bars of skepticism and suspicion.

It's Satan's greatest triumph over us! We're trapped in a cell built stone by stone with our own hands. And still, God holds the only key . . . REPENT.

We desire justification and self-vindication, but it's a fantasy. It's chasing the wind. There is nothing to vindicate. Self apart from Christ is a myth. That which does not exist, that which has no Life cannot be vindicated. We are but dust, we are without Breath. Unless we repent, we cannot come alive.

" . . . becoming real is only possible when we humbly face the sin in our own life and then live in the light of the eternal. Without a true awareness of sin and of grace, our life is condemned to unreality . . . Only in prison, symbolic or physical, does one learn the true meaning of freedom: liberation from one's self."

- Joyful Exiles

I don't know about you, but in this new year and for the rest of the years to come, I want to live . . . really live!

Amazing Grace

2008-11-09T16:30:00.004-06:00

Jesus is the heart of the mystical life, giving us new dimensions to explore. In Him we do not take flight from our world, but reenter it with a divine mission: to love people as Jesus loved them.
- James M. Houston, Joyful Exiles

God says in Ezekiel 20:44 "You will know that I am the Lord, O people of Israel, when I have honored my name by treating you mercifully in spite of your wickedness . . ."

Likewise, the world will know that we are of the One True God when we honor Him in loving and showing mercy to one another despite our horrible and cruel deficiencies. The truth is that we are horrible and cruel when left to our own. If you ever begin to believe otherwise, consider once again the flesh-torn, thorn-crowned Jesus nailed to a cross.

Yet as with all things by God's gracious design, there is blessing even among a curse. Were we to live in a world of relationships that never soured and were never spoiled by our failed humanity, we would never have the opportunity to walk out the difficult truths we claim to believe.

We can "count it all joy" because for our sake, for our very sanctification, we are being tested, refined and approved as we are granted abundant chances to live, walk, speak and forgive as Christ. And in this is accomplished by mystery -- which to us is the greatest reality -- the death, destruction and complete demise of our old sinful self.

By all of this, the hope set before us is that one day nothing will remain but what fully resembles Jesus Himself in us.

Not too long ago, I read Amish Grace, which recounted the incredible forgiveness demonstrated by the Amish community after the Nickel Mines schoolhouse shooting in Pennsylvania. Not only did the Amish speak forgiveness toward the man who killed the youngest and most innocent among them before taking his own life, but within hours of the shooting, they went to his family, embraced his wife and parents and extended grace, compassion and the opportunity for restored relationship.

Far from being shunned and despised, the shooter's wife was actually one of only a few "outsiders" invited to the funeral of one of the victims.

In reading the book, I was of course amazed at the level of conviction held by the Amish for Matthew 6:14-15 “If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins," in that it led them to fully live out their faith and to leave vengeance to God.

But the most extraordinary thing to me, as recorded in the book, wasn't necessarily the merciful response of the Amish, but how greatly the nation took notice of it. The resounding question in the media and from the "man on the street" was "How can they do that?"

There were debates and disputes about the answer. But, I believe that at the deepest level, most, if not all who heard about the Amish response, recognized that mere humanity is incapable of that measure of mercy. And even for the ones that considered but could or would not admit to involvement of the Divine, I think the Amish community's faith in action drew their hearts in the direction of the Author of Grace.

So it can be with us, and I pray that we will allow it to be. For when we love through our hurt and disappointment, through our despair and disillusionment, we become a signpost to Christ.

"But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men" (Luke 6:35).

One Question

2008-11-02T15:57:00.015-06:00

"What a blessedness when I came to the knowledge that I had been looking in the wrong place, when I found that victory, sanctification, deliverance, purity, holiness -- all must be found in Christ Jesus Himself, not in some formula. When I claimed Jesus just for Himself, it became easy and the glory came to my life."
- Albert Benjamin Simpson; 1843-1919

In thinking about the unity of the church in recent weeks, the burning question on my heart has been, "Do we desire Jesus Christ above all things?" Not an idea of Christ, or an imitation of Him or a life of deeds similar to those recorded of Him, but actually Jesus Christ Himself.

As one of my favorite church mission statements says, "To know Him and to make Him known." Actually, I'm just concerned about the first half of that line, because I truly believe that if we really know Him, we will make Him known without even trying. We won't be able to help ourselves!

But I also believe that as fallen human beings, with ego dying a tediously slow death, if it is dying at all, the only honest answer to that question is "no." At worst, simply "no." At best, "not all of the time and probably not even most of the time."

So I have a follow-up question, "Do we want to desire Jesus Christ above all things?"

If the answer to that question is a "yes." If it is even a tearful whisper of "yes." Then, we have found the most firm and faithful common ground that exists on which to stand together and reflect Light into a dark and dying world.

If there is any hesitation at all, any second guessing or sideways glancing, I'm afraid there is not much unity to be attained. We will continue to be distracted and destroyed by a countless number of details and differences. I would say that the earth beneath our feet in that case is crumbling faster than we can try to scurry from one solid fragment to another.

The possibility for relationship from one answer is as precious and powerful as the possibility for separation from the other answer is tragic and disheartening. Yet, I believe there aren't many, if any other questions, that need to be asked of one another. And I don't believe this question is asked or answered nearly often enough.

"But if from there you will seek (inquire for and require as necessity) the Lord your God, you will find Him if you [truly] seek Him with all your heart [and mind] and soul and life" (Deuteronomy 4:29).

Do we "require as necessity" the Lord our God? "Inquire for Him" as though we cannot take another breath and have no desire to unless we attain Him in it? If we do not yet, do we desperately desire that kind of desperation for Jesus, the kind where we willingly and absolutely abandon everything else?

Israel Houghton put words to my heart's desire for every believer in the lyrics of his song, I Will Search . . . "O Majesty, I live to see your face and be transformed."

If this is our common cry, then what we are after is Love, and He has promised that we will find Him. Indeed, He will find us, and we will find one another as our hearts resonate together with His. And somehow, someday, by the mystery and grace of He Who Is greater than we can ever imagine, we will be the fulfillment of Christ's prayer. We will be One.

Count The Cost

2008-10-19T14:57:00.005-05:00

"Believing is going to cost us all" (Fr. Mike Paciello)

Paul applauded the Thessalonians for maintaining their faith in the face of "much persecution" (1:6). As Western Christians, we rarely face persecution like our brothers and sisters in places like China, the Sudan and the Middle East.

And like so many things afforded us as citizens of one of the wealthiest countries in the world, we easily take for granted the freedom to practice what we believe.

The fact that we have little need to exercise our commitment to Christ by facing daily threats against our lives or those of our family can lead us to a kind of spiritual infirmity, much like what happens to our bodies when our muscles are left to atrophy.

A life of ease can leave the physical body weak and prone to injury. A life of spiritual ease can leave the heart, the spirit and the soul unguarded and vulnerable to attack. We do not tangibly feel at war, so we lay down our weapons, even as arrows whiz by our head.

Many of us are walking wounded of the war. And as we live in denial of the greater reality, our untreated wounds fester and ooze, leaving us debilitated and completely ineffective soldiers in God's army.

What makes for a good soldier? I believe he is always one who knows the war is vast and real, and that it cannot be wished or spoken away. I believe she seeks out weapons with which to fight and surrenders herself to the training of how to use them. I believe he lets go of any vainglorious idea that he can be the hero who conquers all alone, that somehow he has no need for the fellow soldier to his right and to his left in the heat of battle.

And I believe all good soldiers look in desperation to their Commander for direction, and they fervently obey, knowing it is the only hope for victory, for life.

What remains for a good soldier to do, actually what makes it possible for a good soldier to do these things, is to count the cost of enlistment. There can be no delusions of a quick, casualty-free engagement with the enemy that directly precedes uninterrupted bliss forever.

Surely for us the bliss is to come. It is the hope set before us, and it is to come for eternity . . . Praise the Lord! But, that is on the other side of Jordan.

On this side, the battles are intense and excruciatingly painful. The terrain is uncertain, and the enemy is cunning and evasive. There are victories, but the fighting is arduous and lengthy, and the mere ability to persevere can only be granted by the Divine.

And sometimes the deepest pain is experienced and the greatest losses are sustained from the "friendly fire" of those in our ranks. The very ones we expected and depended on, if need be, to throw our wracked body over their shoulder and carry us to the safety of base camp. The ones we determined to carry ourselves, rather than surrender them in their weakness to torture or death.

Yet, this is war. Those who've experienced worldly war firsthand paint an uncompromisingly gruesome picture. And there is nothing pretty or promising about our war, save but the promise that the victory has already been won! So, hope prevails. And our hearts can rejoice amidst gut-wrenching ache.

The cost is the way of the Cross. The sacrifice to a reality of war and wounds, of life found through loss and of persevering through pain. It is the way of Christ, the greatest soldier to ever live and the ultimate Commander-in-Chief. To follow Him will cost us all, and yet will also gain for us a glory we cannot yet comprehend.

Get Real

2008-10-13T09:45:00.005-05:00

"The disease blocking our enjoyment of God has spread beyond the point where more effort to do what we think is right will be enough. And there is no anesthetic as the knife penetrates the soul" (Larry Crabb, Inside Out)

All of us have our dark places. They are not the topics of conversation we are likely to bring up at parties, probably not much more likely to bring up in our Sunday School class.

We are so good at maintaining image. Our entire culture is centered on keeping up appearances, and we’ve become well-trained in the art of creating an attractive illusion of who we are. That illusion may be based on reality, but it's partial and distorted. It's a misrepresentation of our true self.

Unfortunately, illusion doesn't get us very far in our Christian fellowship. We think we can convince others that everything in our life is on the up and up, that we can handle it, at all times, day in and day out, year after year. But even if we succeed at it for a little while, as the saying goes, eventually something’s gotta give!

When that breaking comes, as it surely will, where will we turn? And how can we be there for those around us as they are broken by life in a fallen world, as they come to grips with the depth of their self-deception? (News flash: we’re all self-deceived to one degree or another.)

One of the most precious blessings God affords us through the body is the sharing of the burdens of living out the Christian faith amidst inner and outer turmoil, as we battle against a very real enemy of our souls.

Yet, many of us walk years or even a lifetime without benefiting at all from such fellowship because most Christian circles keep relationship as superficial as the social chit chat at a PTA meeting. That’s simply not what God intends or desires for us.

In Waking the Dead, John Eldredge pleads with believers to enter the trench warfare of spiritual battle for one another in deep and transforming relationship, because “ . . . what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

It’s the kind of relationship that can’t happen when we build our concrete walls of self-protection 15-feet high and 6-feet deep. When we never admit our failures, never bring up our core fears, never publicly struggle with our sin and never question our fundamental opinions about life, love and faith.

This is a depth that may never be achieved with a group of 100, maybe not even with a group of 20. But have you sought out even one Christian friend who is willing to walk through the dark nights of the soul with you?

Can you find it in yourself to be mutually vulnerable to the new heart of Christ in another, with whom you can pray the powerful prayers, wrestle with the Word and speak and receive the truth in love? Someone with whom, as Dr. Larry Crabb would say, you can truly connect.

Who can be Christ to you, and to whom can you be Christ in return? The possibility for unspeakable joy and immeasurable connection are within reach.

Are you ready to reach out?

Trust My Heart

2008-10-12T07:32:00.004-05:00

Do you trust me?

It's been used as a catchy line in movies, but the answer to that single question has enormous implications for our spiritual life, both in our personal walk with Christ and in our relationship to other believers.

What enables us to trust our heavenly Father when all around us seems to offer nothing but reasons for doubt?

The only way we can truly surrender in trust to God is in the recognition of His unfailing love toward us, which demands that He desire nothing for us but ultimate good. No matter how much trouble or difficulty or heartache we suffer, we can abide in trust that He is working all things to good because of that great love.

When we struggle in relationship with other believers, when we find ourselves disappointed, offended and angry at one another's actions and words, we should begin to ask ourselves a very piercing question: Do I trust the heart of my brother or my sister in Christ?

If you are trusting in the heart of an unsaved human being, beware! The human heart is filled with detestable things and many desires for evil because of our fallen state. You would be setting yourself up for incredible pain.

Yet, a fellow believer has been renewed in the blood of Christ and has truly been awarded a new heart, one that beats with the love and goodness of its Creator.

"A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you; and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you a heart of flesh" (Ezekiel 36:26).

That is not to say that Christians don't do or say wrong things or fall into sin in their relationships with others. For the work in each of us is not yet complete. But, we have a tremendous gift, should we choose to accept it, that enables us to offer forgiveness to and seek reconciliation with the members of our Christian family as we walk the difficult road to unity.

That gift is to recognize the new heart within our brothers and sisters in Christ and to rest in the assurance that there is love and goodness at the core of the "new man" in them.

When we believe that God has gifted love and goodness into the center of every one of His redeemed children, we can trust them, when needed, to speak into our lives for our greater good, and we can trust that even when they make mistakes in their words and actions toward us, that love is their greatest intention toward us, as it is from us toward them.

Believing in the new heart of Christ within each member of our fellowship, frees us to love one another without fear, to expose ourselves fully with no threat of condemnation, and to walk in the greatest depth of relationship without easily taking offense.

It is the only way we can be patient, avoid envy, choose not to seek our own way, keep no record of wrongs, always hope, always trust, always persevere (1 Corinthians 13).

What binds the body is love. And that is what the world should see. But, it is not a love we can concoct or create by human will or determination. It is a gift of the Father to be received and extended from the new heart of one believer to the new heart in another.

Guarding Faith

2008-10-07T20:05:00.004-05:00

"I walked by the field of a lazy person, the vineyard of one lacking sense. I saw that it was overgrown with thorns. It was covered with weeds, and its walls were broken down. Then, as I looked and thought about it, I learned this lesson: A little extra sleep, a little more slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest -- and poverty will pounce on you like a bandit; scarcity will attack you like an armed robber" (Proverbs 24:30-34).

As I read this verse tonight, I was struck by one thought: We can never be too diligent in guarding our faith through a dynamic, vibrant, ongoing relationship with the Triune God.

It takes only the tiniest of cracks for the enemy to slither through and begin to wreak his havoc, twisting and distorting and reshaping Truth into lie upon lie. He plants one weed in the garden of our faith that multiplies into two, then four and eventually, the weeds grow so tall and numerous that they overtake the tenderly growing flowers of revelation and wisdom, snuffing out their fragrance of life.

I recently heard a prophetic speaker, Pam Hanes, speak the following: "I don't want to settle for even a five-minute-old revelation of God." And I think her words strike to the heart of what our spiritual diligence should be.

Indeed, our God is always speaking, always moving, always working and always revealing Himself. Are we watching, listening, waiting, expecting, sharing and multiplying our faith? Or do we take the small talent He has entrusted to us and bury it in fear and uncertainty over whether there is more to be had, in fact questioning the generosity of God's revelation?

God called the man who buried His one talent "wicked and lazy" (Matthew 25:26). How much more so are we if we rely solely on what we have known from God and of God even five minutes ago. For, the mysteries of love and faithfulness and truth to be discovered through Christ are without end.

Were we by the generosity of the Spirit to have a new insight of Him every single minute for the rest of our lives on earth, we would still be nowhere to the end of what we could know of our Father, of our Savior! How amazing!

I pray that our heart's desire is always to dig deeper. To be ever diligent in seeking, so that the enemy has no place to sneak in and divert us from a passionate and relentless pursuit of our beautiful Bridegroom!

A lifetime is not enough to seek out the fullness of His heart toward us. But, because that is true, what an incredible journey of endless discovery, what "wonder and adventure"* awaits us in this life as we look forward to the day when all is revealed and made known! (* The Shack).

Restoration

2008-10-03T12:27:00.005-05:00

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast" (1 Peter 5:10).

I've been thinking and praying a great deal in recent weeks about restoration, as a personal need and as a widespread need within the church. Misty Edwards, David Brymer and the worship team at the International House of Prayer in Kansas City, Ka., actually have a beautiful worship song titled "Restoration" that you can listen to on YouTube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LcyQOLVS_U).

Part of the lyrics go like this:

You've taken my pain
You call me by a new name
You've taken my shame
And in its place, you give me joy

You take my mourning
And turn it into dancing
You take my weeping
And turn it into laughing

You take my mourning
And turn it into dancing
You take my sadness
And turn it into joy

So, how do we come to restoration by God's Spirit? The answer lies in how we get ourselves into places where we need to be restored!

Even as we desire to surrender fully to God's will for our lives, to "give up" and "die to self" so that we can live as true disciples of Christ with no agenda of our own, we will come to a point in bearing the cross that we begin to question if we've made the right decision.

In a moment of elation in the Spirit, it can be somewhat easy to make your vow. I do not mean that the pledge is diminished in any way or is less than authentic and wholehearted because it is made on the mountaintop. But, as Oswald Chambers writes, "The power of the saint lies in the coming down and in the living that is done in the valley."

Yet, in the valley and in the sharing of the passion of Christ and of His suffering, the question will come: "Is this what I signed up for?" At that moment, you have left the rest and assurance of God and you have ceased to adore Him for holding back nothing that will bring you to the perfection of His Son, which is found in the resurrection to life after suffering and death.

When we find ourselves in this place of uncertainty, we must honestly turn our face back to our Father and ask that by His Spirit He guide us once again into His "rest" so that we may show forth "adoration". Then, we will experience divine "restoration".

We rest because we recognize once more that everything is sovereignly in His hands to come to His ultimate glory. And we adore Him for being so trustworthy and faithful to us in all things, even those which bring us the deepest pain.

When we have passed through our "little while" of suffering -- for even if it lasts a lifetime, it is a little while on the scale of eternity! -- we find that what is produced in us is faith in, trust in and love for God that is so "strong, firm and steadfast" that it cannot be shaken. It has become eternal.

Obedience or Surrender

2008-09-15T21:16:00.010-05:00

"And this is how we may discern [daily, by experience] that we are coming to know Him [to perceive, recognize, understand, and become better acquainted with Him]: if we keep (bear in mind, observe, practice) His teachings (precepts, commandments)" (I John 2:3).

Many of us are familiar with a simplified, if you will, translation of this verse, but I personally love the Amplified because of the nuances it includes.

I read this verse today for the first time. Not really for the first time. But, I truly believe I read it as it was intended for the first time.

I've always thought that these words implied that in order to prove our knowledge and love of God, we must make sure to keep His commandments. Basically, we are to learn and follow the rules, be obedient, so that we have evidence that we take our faith seriously and desire to please God.

Yet, I was struck so clearly today that this verse is actually an invitation to relationship and an encouragement that if we will put our relationship with God first, just as Christ did on earth, then we will certainly keep His commandments and thrill Him in the process. The above verse is kin to another very familiar one: "But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right), and then all these things taken together will be given you besides" (Matthew 6:33).

What are we to "seek, aim at and striver after"? What was Jesus' "way of doing and being right"? It was continual fellowship with His Father, from which He was guided to every step, directed in every word and lead in every deed. Indeed, every move that Jesus made was from His surrender to His Father. And because of His devotion to relationship, God also granted Him everything else.

David G. Benner concludes directly: "Those who surrender obey. But not all who obey surrender." And, I think that sums it up nicely. We must come to recognition that the "problem in trying to do what God asks is that it leaves the kingdom of self intact . . . The whole point of the kingdom of God is to overturn the kingdom of self."

We can spend our lives trying to check off requirements on a list, filling in bubbles on the "Christian" test sheet with a #2 pencil, tediously piecing together our spiritual resume with every "t" crossed and every "i" dotted.

We can live our lives with an eye on our eulogy. Imagining the glorious honors that will be recited about us and our great sacrifice for and commitment to the faith.

Or, we can devote our hearts to a tangible, experiential, personal encounter with the Lover God of our souls in a surrender that cares not what becomes of self but that all things draw us deeper into Him who is Perfect Love.

"Life lived with resolve and determination is life lived apart from surrender. It is living in clenched-fisted doggedness. It is living the illusion that I can be in control. It is the rule of life in the kingdom of self . . . Obedience that is the grudging fruit of willful determination" serves merely to "reinforce our egocentricity and make us more rigid and more proud" (Benner)

So, what is it going to be? I guarantee that if we surrender, though we will be surprised, we will not be disappointed. Though we will be imperfect, we will not fail. Though we will be weak, we will not be afraid. And in all things, we will have oil in our lamps to shine in a dark world, and we will utterly delight the heart of our Bridegroom both now and upon His return.

All to Jesus, I surrender

All to Him I freely give

I will ever love and trust Him

In His presence daily live

All to Jesus I surrender

Humbly at His feet I bow

Worldly pleasures all forsaken

Take me, Jesus, take me now

All to Jesus, I surrender

Make me, Savior, wholly Thine

Let me feel the Holy Spirit

Truly know that Thou art mine

All to Jesus, I surrender

Lord, I give myself to Thee

Fill me with Thy love and power

Let Thy blessing fall on me

All to Jesus I surrender

Now I feel the sacred flame

O the joy of full salvation!

Glory, glory, to His Name!

I surrender all

All to Thee, my blessed Savior

I surrender all

The Thief

2008-09-14T17:09:00.005-05:00

"But of this be assured: if the householder had known at what time the burglar was coming, he would have been awake and alert and watching and would not have permitted his house to be dug through and broken into" (Luke 12:39).

This verse is slipped into a larger story about a group of servants being watchful for their master's return from a wedding banquet. I've read the story a number of times, always focused on Jesus' admonition for believers to be watchful and ready for His second coming.

Yet, Jesus makes mention about a "burglar," a thief, and the potential for the owner of the house to be caught unaware. Why didn't the householder know when the thief was coming?

He hadn't sought godly wisdom to discern such threats, nor was he equipped with the godly love to handle them. He only had worldly discernment, which is spiritual blindness, and worldly love, which is weak and non-confrontational.

So, he was a sitting duck, faced inevitably with watching his home "dug through and broken into," with seeing his life ransacked, abused and destroyed.

If the householder's life were grounded by a personal relationship with Jesus, he would certainly be prepared to see His Savior face to face on the day of His return.

If he had a revelation and understanding of the nature of the world we live in based on the spiritual truths taught by Christ, he would certainly be girded for battle against the enemy of God with the bold love of Christ -- the love that identified the Pharisees as "whitewashed tombs" and rebuked Peter, "Get thee behind Me, Satan."

Part of what makes heaven so incredible to look forward to is that there is no longer a thief. There is no longer an enemy that will approach or seek to take what God has given or to divert us from seeking that which He offers (Luke 12:33).

But as we pass through as pilgrims on the earth, we cannot naively ignore that this is an "evil world in which we live" (Luke 1:3).

It may sound like a pat answer to complex issues, but there is a relatively simple and truthful answer to the question "Why do so many bad things happen in this world?"

Because there is an enemy of God at play and we are the pawns in his twisted game. And sometimes, because of our own sinfulness and self-centeredness, we let him get his way. When we do, the only possible result we can expect is devastation.

Evil seeks to devour, and we are currently being hunted.

You will never suit up in your armor and prepare yourself for battle until you realize you are the prey.

How Bold Are You?

2008-09-12T17:02:00.006-05:00

I've become an avid reader in my adulthood -- my father is so proud! I grew up seeing a stack of "current reads" beside his recliner in the living room at all times. If he wasn't eating, sleeping or working, there was a 90% chance he was engrossed in a book.

I'm turning out to be a lot like him, although I do have enough other responsibilities pulling me away at different times that the opportunity to read at all feels precious.

Most recently, God has strongly convicted me to get back into Scripture -- and it has been an amazing journey, which has supplied much of the content of my posts on this blog.

But, over the past few days, because I finally made a trip to the library to get something to pass the time as I endured "jury duty," I have been rocked by Bold Love by Dr. Dan B. Allender and Dr. Tremper Longman III.

There have been so many "aha" moments as I've turned the pages, written primarily by Allender, a M.Div. graduate of Westminster Theological Seminary with a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology.

I usually read a portion from a book, then paraphrase and expand on it with my own thoughts in my journal. With Bold Love, I found myself just copying paragraph after paragraph word for word.

So, while I'll be processing this book for many more days and further blogs are likely to come from it, I wanted to share some of the high points:

The Sum Total is this: There is NO method, path or plan, NO activity or set of relationships, NO emotional experience or physical state, NO material good or financial status, NO degree of power or level of prestige that can satisfy the deepest, truest hunger in our souls, which is for relationship, for union with God Himself.

"Destructive lust is filled by a determination to make life more palatable and perfect than it can possibly be in a fallen world." We, even though we may be believers, are still unwilling to admit that there simply is no heaven this side of heaven.

The joy of eternity is "set before us," and though there are certainly glimpses and tastes which are sweet and beckoning and that keep us mindful of what awaits us, that joy is not to be had fully for the taking here and now.

Even our actions as Christians, those that we want others to believe are the result of pure and loving motives and which in all likelihood actually appear to be so, are suspect because of the truths stated above. Because they are also just another way that we seek to make this fallen world something that it cannot be until it is set right by Christ's return.

We believe that if we do enough of the right, Christlike -- at least as we've been taught -- things and if we achieve our predetermined idea of the "good life" in whatever specific way we define it, then we'll avoid the consequences of life in a world wrecked by sin.

"A lot of activity that is seen as spiritual is infused with fear, pretense and ritual" and is based on "protecting self or others from difficult truths."

"Is it possible that many are involved in using talents, exercising power, and sacrificing enormous portions of money and flesh without being driven by a heart of love?" Allender says yes. So, do I.

We also believe that we can sidestep repentance on the road to healing, wholeness and the only true joy in life on either side of heaven, and we ignore the reality of spiritual battle between God and His enemy for the souls of all. And this battle is more often waged in the most seemingly innocuous moments of our day-to-day than it is in great tragedy or crisis.

Finally, for now, not only are we and those around us devastatingly harmed as we refuse to come face to face with these truths, God Himself -- a deity bent on "emotionally rich relationship" -- suffers our arrogance, deceit, disloyalty and rebellion.

"Our divine Lover actually endures enormous abuse from His chosen bride as she turns to others to find what only her true Spouse can provide."

I hope these tidbits have pricked your ears and, most importantly, your heart. Bold Love is another tool in the total remodeling of mine!

For Forgiveness Sake

2008-09-09T17:56:00.004-05:00

Christianity is never about finding a relatively "good" status quo.

Regardless of how seemingly generous, noble or self-sacrificing our lives may be when judged by your actions, if our day-to-day experience (the sum total internal and external) is essentially the same as yesterday, last week or ten years ago . . . rest assured, we've settled.

We have not come into the fullness of the power of Christ for transformation and radical upheaval (if you can truly say you want that!) in our lives. Why?

Because we haven't yet wholly and honestly accepted our sinfulness in light of Him who is holy.

I've written a blog about a similar insight before, but God has brought it back to the forefront and confirmed it once again through Dan B. Allender's Bold Love.

We have, quite simply, explained ourselves away with any number of convenient excuses and palatable descriptions. We have justified our choices and our individual conditions. Like it or not, and I can assure that we don't, we are Job.

Though we believe, at least we profess to believe, we have not yet seen with our eyes. We have not been struck dumb and silent by the majesty of God, His just position to destroy us and His unfathomably merciful choice to embrace us and shower us with the "kisses of His mouth" (Song of Solomon 1:2).

Now hear me, please. This is not to say that absolutely every external in your life will change as you grow in Christ. Yet, certainly some things will, and the internal gets a complete overhaul. Sometimes as giant pieces break off, sometimes as miniscule chips are chiseled away.

This overhaul continues and manifests over a lifetime as your capacity to grant others the unexpected and unwarranted forgiveness you have received. As you apprehend this forgiveness in the depth of your being, you are enabled to finally, openly love and be loved with the bold assurance of Christ.

Why is a grasp of forgiveness the key?

"Only he who knows the greatness of wrath will be mastered by the greatness of mercy."
-- John Stott, The Cross of Christ

What happens when our recognition of sin, our sin and our wickedness, is ignored or minimized?

"We are free to define the vague higher power of modern culture in any way we choose, provided our definition allows no room for God as judge . . . Leave out the reality of wrath and the Cross is a caricature of sentimental love" that fails to bring "to bear the reality of what our sin deserves."
-- Dr. Dan B. Allender

Are we willing to admit that even in the best we have to offer, purely because of the humanness of our effort, we are "arrogant and deceitful people"?

As long as we avoid this truth about ourselves, we are avoiding and losing the Truth about God that can open our prison cell and set us free. We have to first recognize and admit that we are, in fact, in prison. Not only that, but we deserve to be there!

Only then can we exclaim with aunthenticity and awe, without any trace of triviality or dismissal, that "God sees me wrapped in the righteousness of His Son and love the me I am and the me I will become. I can rejoice" (Bold Love).

Why do we keep trying to "pay" God back for Jesus with our service? It is such a futile effort and it can never be done.

No sacrifice equals, even comes in sight of, what He has already graciously given. Even sacrifice of self falls short, although it is truly the best we can do.

Let go of details, of specific choices. Give in to the greater mystery of God at work in us. Leave the details to His omniscience and sovereignty.

He will do what is best. He will do a complete, in fact perfect, job that we are simply unable and unequipped in ourselves to do.

One thing

2008-09-08T16:44:00.004-05:00

"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her" (Luke 10:41-42).

With this verse, translations vary, as always. Some say only one thing, others say few things. As best I can discern, Christ is pointing out that so few things in life are truly necessary, yet we busy ourselves in anxiety and worry over details that will simply pass away with the simple passage of time.

There is so much in life that is not eternal, but these things can be the bulk of our concern if we allow them to be.

Yet, truly One thing is needed in our lives. Christ is the One thing that will make clear the few things that remain important.

And if we choose Him, even though "many things" present themselves all around us, we will find ourselves in the center of God's will, and He will lead us to every other thing that He has for us or desires of us.

We must trust Him to do this. It takes great faith -- faith in what cannot be seen or quantified -- on the part of a zealous Christian servant to turn and become a zealous lover of Christ. It requires him to believe that in abandoning himself fully to Jesus, he will be poured out in service and love to the world in the deepest and most meaningful ways possible.

"Many Christian workers have left Jesus Christ alone and yet tried to serve Him out of a sense of duty, or because they sense a need as a result of their own discernment . . . Our soul has gotten out of intimate contact with God by leaning on our own religious understanding (see Proverbs 3:5-6) . . . If we do something simply out of a sense of duty, we are trying to live up to a standard that competes with Jesus Christ . . . it is easy to explain the reason for our actions to others. But when we do something out of obedience to the Lord, there can be no other explanation -- just obedience."
-- Oswald Chambers

Martha had discerned a need. Her heart was to serve. And to serve Christ, nonetheless. To offer Him a glorious meal. Yet somewhere in the process of making her choice that evening, she missed the heart of Jesus Himself, which was to be with her . . . not to be served by her, but to be known by her.

As Ken Gire notes, "Here is a magnanimous gesture, but a mistaken one. Jesus doesn't want food. He wants fellowship."

And though Martha serves, at a deep level that finally surfaces in her comment to Jesus (Luke 10:40), she resents her choice and feels abandoned by those she most expected to come to her aide, particularly Mary.

Though she goes through the motions of service, her heart is without love because she thinks only of her sister's absence, judging Mary's heart to be childish and slacking, believing she has conveniently avoided the responsibility of providing a meal for Christ.

Martha judges herself mature and responsible, laboring intensely for her Lord. All the while, she looks at Mary and condemns her for taking the easy road of lingering at Christ's feet when there's so much work to be done.

But, Christ makes it clear that Martha misses one extremely important thing. In fact, she misses the most important Person who ever lived. That night, she missed Jesus. Tragic. Yet, we make Martha's mistake all the time.

How can we, then, be like Mary? Ken Gire expands upon Christ's answer:

"Fellowship with Him is a matter of priorities. And a matter of choice. It's the better part of the meal life has to offer. It is, in fact, the main course.

Jesus says something extraordinary about what Mary did: it would become a permanent part of her life; it would count for eternity. Quite a promise.

And what did Mary do? All she did was sit. It is where she sat that made the difference."

Be Like Daddy

2008-09-07T16:55:00.005-05:00

"But Jesus said, 'Let the children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these'" (Matthew 19:14).

God is continuing to work through the words of my daughter's prayer on me, and to use both of my girls as visual reminders every day of how we are to be like children before Him. He truly is our heavenly Father.

In one of his devotionals, Ken Gire expands upon Christ's teaching the disciples how to pray and specifically notes the simplicity of the Lord's prayer. So basic and unadorned . . . the way a child speaks. In the closing prayer of his devotional, he provides the following illustration:

"Take my small clumsy hands in yours and walk with me, Lord. Lead the way through the dark streets. And help me to keep pace with you so that your will would be done in my life here on earth as it is in heaven."

I got mental picture -- and I don't get them very often -- that struck me to the core. I saw myself as a little girl excitedly trying to match steps with my Daddy, to follow after Him and be just like Him.

It reminded me of the way my girls sometimes do this when they walk beside my husband, eyes looking up and lips curled into big smiles.

I thought of how tender my husband is toward his children's wholehearted desire to be with him and imitate him, and that illustrated so clearly the heart that most pleases God. It is the heart of a believer who sees himself as a child . . . eager to learn, eager to emulate, eager to do anything he sees his father do. Trusting that the best he can be is "just like Daddy."

So many of us, so much of the time have lost that innocence, that sense of wonder toward and dependence on God, our Father. We've let ourselves become self-sufficient adults. Maybe worse than that, we are unruly teenagers who think we know it all!

But we're just kids! We're in training. We have so much yet to learn. There is heaven on earth to be revealed if we are willing to be wide-eyed and recklessly abandoned children of God, rather than stiff and stuffy, frustrated and jaded grown-ups.

I can hear the Toys 'R Us theme song playing in my mind: "I don't wanna grow up . . ." And, you know what? I don't! Do you?

I pray we revel and rejoice in our smallness, for "Little ones to Him belong. They are weak, but He is strong!"

Out of the Mouth . . .

2008-09-03T21:09:00.006-05:00

And He called a little child to Himself and put him in the midst of them, and said, 'Truly I say to you, unless you repent (change, turn about) and become like little children [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving], you can never enter the kingdom of heaven [at all]'" (Matthew 18:2-3).

I've pondered this verse many times. Actually, I've pondered a paraphrase of this verse -- "you must become like a child" -- and thought to myself, "What does it mean become like little children? How do we do that? What is God asking of us?"

Tonight, I saw the word repent for the first time. In another translation, it reads change. Yet, in another, it reads turn. They all apply.

And they are things we must do over and over again to remain truly trusting, lowly, loving and forgiving. We repent of our state before a holy God. We surrender ourselves to change in our hearts and in our minds so that more and more we resemble His Firstborn (Colossians 1:15).

And we turn from every thought, every word and every deed that does not flow from intimate devotion to Him.

Tonight, as I put my four-year-old to bed. She prayed something annointed and beautiful. She is wise in spirit beyond her years. She understands the core Truth that some miss for a lifetime. She declares it even though there are mysteries in what she says that I know she can't fully comprehend.

Her prayer was to her heavenly Daddy, and it flowed out of child's surrendered heart. Hers is the surrender that Jesus says is the only way into the Kingdom.

God has never cared for our fancy words. This is how I want to pray:

" Thank You God for this day. I love You, God. I want You to do anything. I want You to do everything. Don't let us do anything bad, because You want us to be good. You want to stay with us. You don't want us to leave You. You want us to be with You. You don't want the devil to get us. Because You are in our heart, and we are in Your heart. You want us to do anything You say. You want to love us. You want to hug us. You want to kiss us. Thank You, God. I love You. I love You. I love You. I love You. You are my Lord. A-men."

Earplugs

2008-09-03T17:20:00.010-05:00

"Yet they would not listen and obey or incline their ears; but they stiffened their necks, that they might not hear and might not receive instruction" (Jeremiah 17:23)

I can't think of any parent that hasn't experienced the frustration that can be involved as you try to communicate with a child. I've literally watched children stick their fingers in their ears and proceed to yell "la la la la la la la" at the top of their lungs to avoid listening to the words coming out of a parent's mouth.

Why doesn't a child want to hear his parent? Doesn't the child understand the parent's language? Certainly, a young child has limited vocabularly, but children speak the same language as their parents and a good parent speaks to a child's level.

Doesn't the child recognize that a parent speaks out of love? I think most often he does. Doesn't the child trust the parent? Again, I think most often the child would say he does.

If it isn't a question of language or love or trust. What is it? The communication barrier between a parent and child is most often a state of the child's will that is already set against hearing.

Quite simply because once he has heard, and his parent knows he has heard, he will be forced to make a choice about obedience to something he has already decided he doesn't want to do. It is the wall of the child's self already under construction, and it begins early to separate the child from his parent as he seeks to form his own identity in the world.

The Bible translations are mixed in the wording of the verse above . . . some using only the word listen or only obey or hear, but I particularly like the combination used in the Amplified translation. For to "listen," to "hear" demands response.

The resonse may be to ignore, but as it is the not doing of what has been commanded, it must be deemed disobedience. Or the response may be the doing of that which has been instructed, in which case it is obedience. But it will be one or the other, it will fall on one side of the line that has been drawn.

I am coming to realize more and more how we, the very children of God, behave toward him the way earthly children behave toward their parents. We simply refuse to listen. We busy ourselves with service, make our choices, ask for His blessing, pronounce ourselves "good Christian people" and plug up our ears.

I believe all Christians have heard their Father, for Jesus tells us that He and the Father are one and that His sheep know His voice (John 10:30; 10:27, respectively).

So, we hear Him at some point, and we obey. Perhaps our obedience stops at our choice to repent and believe. Perhaps we listen a little longer and decide to obey a few more select commands. But somewhere along the way, for the sake of our own convenience and comfort, we stop listening for anything new. We pitch a tent and start to camp.

Some of us only camp for a week. Some of us camp for the rest of our lives, coasting on a 40-year-old revelation of God because we were unwilling to sacrifice any more of our self.

Protecting self against further change, beyond what we have defined as our accepted Christian normal, is a form of trying to save our life.

It falls back to making our choices, good though some of them may be, based on our minds, wills and feelings. But we are called to live as Christ, whose heart's sole desire was to please and be a delight to His Father, our Father.

Jesus didn't act on every "opportunity for service" that presented iself, yet He taught the story of the good Samaritan to show that we must be willing to be inconvenienced by the needs of others.

Christ's life reveals that it is only by being perfectly in tune by unbroken relationship with God that we are able, as He was, to perfectly discern each step, each divinely appointed act of our calling on a day-to-day basis.

The communication of that relationship, as we speak surrender to God and He speaks direction, instruction and encouragement, enables us in perfect peace to do His will. We are free to be inconvenienced because we realize every detail of our lives, including our broken schedule, is sovereignly in His hands so as to be to His glory.

Christ warns us that "whoever wishes to save his life will lose it," and that if we are "ashamed of His words," refusing to hear and to accept the instruction He offers, He will be ashamed of us "when He comes in the glory of His Father with the holy angels" (Mark 8:35,38).

Are we listening?

Purposeful Sorrow

2008-09-02T14:02:00.010-05:00

"Sorrow is better than laughter, for sadness has a refining influence on us" (Ecclesiastes 7:3).

In our western culture, especially, one of our biggest spiritual -- likely, emotional and physical as well -- problems is that we want to avoid all pain.

We live our lives with ulcered stomachs, disillusioned minds and fretful faces because this world comes complete with both laughter and weeping, pleasure and agony, rejoicing and mourning, delight and grief.

We revel in the highs, but we fail to reconcile the meaning of and therefore desperately seek to avoid the lows. And we miss out on great manifestations of God's strength in our weaknesses, and we stunt our spiritual growth.

For a plant to grow, it needs both light and rain. We are no different. If we have only the warmth of sunny rays, we eventually begin to dry out and wither. The rain that comes in the storms of life provides water to revive and renew us if we are willing to soak it in.

From an earthly perspective, there would be nothing better than a world without hard times, a life free from strife. But, God is preparing and proving us for eternity. And the circumstances He uses to bring us into perfection often look very different from those we would desire ourselves.

Therefore, if we truly and eagerly desire holiness, we must take up our crosses and follow in the footsteps of a Savior who was crucified. We must never glamorize this journey in our minds, in our hearts.

The breaking of His flesh and the blood poured out was real and raw, and it was excruciating. And if we endure, if we are faithful to Him as He deserves and longs for us to be, we will face excruciating crucifixions of our own. Were that the end of the story, it would be a discomforting and disheartening thought to say the least.

But through Christ, God ultimately takes what is painful, that which causes us to lament -- recognition and repentance of sin, physical tragedy, material loss, sickness of the body or unexpected circumstances -- and He turns it into dancing; He turns it into joy (Proverbs 30:11) to bring us into mature faith and spiritual wholeness and to glorify and bring honor to His name.

Christ has indeed won the victory for us. While we may walk through the dark hours and desert places, we have a "hope set before us" (Hebrews 6:18) that allows us to endure as Christ, knowing that by God's promise, we will be raised to walk in the Power of His resurrection.

"When I feel the sting of the wind in my face and the fury of the waves in my soul, may I learn to put my trust in you, not in the strength of my hands or in the smoothness of the circumstances that surround me." (Ken Gire)

Forsaking Fellowship

2008-09-01T09:07:00.006-05:00

" . . . what fellowship can light have with darkness?" (2 Corinthians 6:14)

According to Scripture, not every fellowship in which we can engage will improve our spiritual welfare or further our devotion to Christ. We must be careful to discern with whom God would have us spend our time.

Certainly, Christ calls us out of our "holy huddles," as I've heard Christian circles described, to reach out to a dark and dying world. As He left the comfort of religiousity to touch lepers, dine with tax collectors and converse with prostitutes.

If all we ever do is sit inside our homes, inside our churches, and speak of holy things, we dishonor the sacrifice made by Christ to bring us into His resurrection and to sanctify us into a generous holiness that allows His love, grace and Truth to be poured out onto the world.

Remember, however, that though Christ did go out into the world to be among the broken and the destitute, to heal the sick and preach the Truth with both His words and His actions, His inner circle was the believers -- the Apostles.

We must be careful not to allow our inner circle, those with whom we share the most intimate and most frequent fellowship, to be those who do not profess and truly desire Christ.

We can never confuse or substitute the activity and relationship borne of reaching out to the lost with the fellowship among believers that is necessary for sharpening one another.

"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another" (Proverbs 27:17).

We are able to sharpen one another for service because we are all made of the same material -- Christ is the iron in each of us. What becomes interesting here is that we need a wide variety in our fellowship so that there is the quality of iron needed for each of us to be sharpened.

The iron in us will need iron of a stronger quality against which it can be whetted and honed -- the more spiritually mature brothers and sisters in our fellowship, particularly those in leadership.

And the iron in us will be useful for filing away the rough edges of the "infant" believers around us, with whom we can share what has been revealed of Christ and His faithfulness to us at this point in our journey.

In addition to instruments of sharpening, we are meant to be a spiritual comfort and encouragement to one another in our assembly.

"Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another . . ." (1 Thessalonians 5:11).

It is foolishness from the heart of rebellious individuality to think that we are wise enough and spiritually strong enough on our own to bear the weight of the ministry of Christ.

The burden may be easy, the yoke may be light, but our "flesh is weak" (Matthew 26:41). It is pride that will not allow us to concede that truth, and pride must be crucified in us if we are to come into the fullness of the perfection to which we are called.

Our point in gathering is not to revel in our good fortune as those who are saved and being sanctified, for we deserve nothing that God has granted.

Instead, we come together to "spur one another on toward love and good deeds" (Hebrews 10:24) and to "warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak" and "be patient toward all" (1 Thessalonians 5:14).

Make no mistake. It is not easy work, and it rarely comes with the satisfaction of being "useful" in the eyes of those who believe the only true work of the believer is that which is done outside the church walls.

But it is necessary for us and our brethren, that we might walk in unity and completeness as the body of Christ to the world. So, "let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching!" (Hebrews 10:25).

The Path Set Before

2008-08-29T18:51:00.004-05:00

God is so gracious and tender with His children. I am like an infant learning to walk as I attempt to hear from and share His heart. He knows that I am weak in flesh and might easily stumble.

So, He pours out encouragement and confirmation in abundance to spur me on, that I might persevere. I'm so grateful that He shows me I am not walking alone. And, I have the peace and comfort of resting on the shoulders, submitting to the authority, of those who have walked much longer and deeper in faith.

Tonight, I was led to the following exhortation in Beth Moore's Jesus: 90 days with the One and Only:

"I find it interesting that Christ's instruction to His disciples to go and minister was for a specific mission or task. I believe the concepts of calling and task are often confused in the body of Christ. I know that I confused the concepts in the early years of my surrender to ministry.

When I was in my mid-twenties, my wonderful ministry mentor, Marge Caldwell, helped me to see that God had equipped me with some of the speaking gifts. Once I began to exercise those gifts, I assumed that speaking was my calling. God soon made very clear, however, that my calling was to surrender my life every day to His will, to be His woman, and to do what He asked, whatever that was.

I remember sensing Him speak to my heart saying, 'Beth, I do not want you surrendered to an assigment. I want you surrendered to Me.' I realized that God did not want me 'hung up' on the kind of assignment He would give me.
He didn't want it to matter to me whether He asked me to teach the Word of God to a hundred people or to rock one baby in the church nursery. My calling was to be abandoned to Him.

The Twelve were called to be Christ's learners or pupils. They were also designated apostles, meaning they would be sent forth. What would His pupils be sent forth to do? Whatever He told them.
In our human need for security of sameness, we tend to want one job assignment from God that we can do for the rest of our lives. He's far more creative than that!

You may ask, 'Isn't it possible for God to assign a lifelong task such as preaching at one church for forty years?' Absolutely! But we are wise not to make assumptions by surrendering to the assignment! Our calling is to surrender to God. Think of the pitfalls we could avoid if we were more abandoned to God than to a particular kind of service.

Remember the meaning of disciple: pupil, learner! We can't keep skipping class -- our time with God in the Scripture and in prayer -- and expect to know when He's scheduled a field trip!"

Mirrors of Christ

2008-08-29T13:16:00.006-05:00

I've found in my walk with God that He is a God of confirmation, speaking the same message through several unrelated outlets so that I know it is the word He intends for me to hear.

And so it goes with the message for this post, which has developed specifically over the past two days:

I first had the sense in my spirit Thursday afternoon -- some will note this as similar to a thought, but it doesn't seem to come from you -- that God was telling me "It all begins with relationship with me. Everything begins as you sit at my feet." That sentence repeatedly played in my heart.

In a later conversation with my mother, she brought up the story of Mary and Martha, specifically talking about how Mary chose the "better part," while Martha busied herself with activity. When Martha asked Jesus to rebuke Mary for her apparent laziness, Christ instead reprimands Martha for criticizing her sister's desire and decision to soak in His presence.

Before bed Thursday night, I prayed that God would make it clear to me whether that was truly His word or whether I had missed His voice or His intent in what I believed I had heard.

Friday morning, as I sat with Him, praying and reading Scripture, I was led to both Job and 2 Corinthians, as well as a devotion in Oswald Chambers' My Utmost For His Highest.

Job seemed to have a lot of trouble acknowledging what a wretched man he was in his own right before God. Instead of humbling himself to God's wisdom, he spent his time justifying his righteousness by listing his deeds:

"Have I refused to help the poor, or crushed the hopes of widows who looked to me for help? Have I been stingy with my food and refused to share it with hungry orphans? . . . Whenever I saw someone who was homeless and without clothes, did they not praise me for providing wool clothing to keep them warm?" (Job 31:16-17, 19)

But God was not impressed with Job's list or his arrogance in stating his goodness by living a life that appeared sacrificial. His words flow from the mouth of Elihu:

"Why don't people say to God, 'I have sinned, but I will sin no more'? Or 'I don't know what evil I have done; tell me, and I will stop at once'?" (Job 34:31-32)

Instead, we plead our own case, build up a file of our works of service and presume to tell God that we're doing a good job for the Kingdom and He should be well pleased.

But, God is not pleased by the work of our hands, if that work does not flow from the "great trust in God through Christ" (2 Corinthians 3:4) that is nurtured as we build relationship with Him and willingly acknowledge that "our only power and success come from God" (2 Corinthians 3:4-5).

Paul told the Corinthians that they should have an answer for "those who brag about having a spectacular ministry rather than having a sincere heart before God" (2 Corinthians 5:12).

For God jealously yearns (James 4:5) that we take the time to bask in His light and listen to His Truth so that we may become "mirrors that brightly reflect the glory of the Lord. And as the Spirit of the Lord works within us, we become more and more like Him and reflect His glory even more" (3:18).

Oswald Chambers elaborates on Christs' words to His followers as they reveled in their new-found power to cast out demons as He tells them to solely rejoice that their "names are written in heaven" (Luke 10:20):

"The trap you may fall into in Christian work is to rejoice in successful service -- rejoicing in the fact that God has used you. Yet you will never be able to measure fully what God will do through you if you have a right-standing relationship with Jesus Christ.

If you keep your relationship right with Him, then regardless of your circumstances or whoever you encounter each day, He will continue to pour 'rivers of living water' through you (John 7:38). And it is actually by His mercy that He does not let you know it [so that no man may boast of his deeds as if they are his own!] . . .

Our tendency today is to put the emphasis on service. Beware of the people who make their request for help on the basis of someone's usefulness. If you make usefulness the test, then Jesus Christ was the greatest failure who ever lived. For the saint, direction and guidance come from God Himself, not some measure of that saint's usefulness . . .

All that our Lord gives His attention to in a person's life is that person's relationship with God -- something of great value to His Father."

In The Message, Eugene Peterson summarizes it like this: "All the same, the great triumph is not in your authority over evil, but in God's authority over you and presence with you. Not what you do for God but what God does for you—that's the agenda for rejoicing."

A Seeker's Heart

2008-08-29T07:38:00.005-05:00

At this point in my blog, with many things having been said, I simply want to lay before you my posture in posting on this site. In no way do I seek to elevate myself or to present myself as having found every answer or every facet of God's Truth.

He is faithfully speaking, and I am making time to listen, but I know that this lifetime is not enough to learn everything. And I am continually in the process of being molded into the image of Christ.

I've had someone recently challenge me that faith must be evaluated by the service of the believer, rather than by a relationship with Christ. And, I believe God will have me address that argument more fully soon.

I have also been described as a "self-righteous" Christian who is setting an unattainable standard that will push the non-believer further from Christ.

For the moment . . . God has given me this response, and as it gets at the heart of why I am writing on this site in the first place, I desire to share it with you all:

Which response do you believe is more encouraging to those who consider coming to faith and who desire to please God in love?

"Welcome to this fold of broken, imperfect people whose only hope is to surrender to Christ, Who is the only Power that can work good in and through us!"

or

"Welcome to this fold. Now that you believe, get to work. It's a 'real pain in the you know what' sometimes. But, that's the proof that you mean business!"

Christ said His yoke is easy and His burden is light. And it is from the outpouring of His love into us as we have our relationship with Him that any "good fruit" is borne.

We must first know Christ in Himself and in us so that we can truly recognize and serve Christ in others.

"Are we trying to pat ourselves on the back again? No . . . Whatever we do, it is because Christ's love controls us" (2 Corinthians 5:12,14).

"Not that I have now attained [this ideal], or have already been made perfect, but I press on to lay hold of (grasp) and make my own, that for which Christ Jesus (the Messiah) has laid hold of me and made me His own" (Phillipians 3:12).

I am not the greatest among anyone. I am a seeker of Truth and a sinner in need of greater and greater grace as God chips away at my "old man" to reveal a "new man" that brings glory to Himself.

Christ is the greatest among us all. And He is our only hope!

Hearing God

2008-08-29T06:16:00.003-05:00

I will never cease to be in awe that God would share His heart with His children, and I will never cease to mourn that so often -- and I am guilty in my own life -- we would rather continue as we are than hear directly from Him as He searches our ways and knows us better than we know ourselves.

Elihu said to Job: "God speaks again and again, though people do not recognize it" (Job 33:14). Yet, Jesus also said, "My sheep hear my voice" (John 10:27). Is this a disconnect? No.

The non-believer hasn't been given ears to hear yet, for Jesus chooses whom He will "deliberately" make the Father known to (Matthew 11:27).

The believer has made his choice to shut his ears. Like, Job, he spends his time proclaiming his own rightness and refuses to submit to the thundering voice of God: "Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me, if you know so much . . . Are you going to discredit my justice and condemn me so you can say you are right" (Job 38:4 and 40:7)

We have a lifetime of learning to do. God desires to make His revelations continually known, and we have just begun to grasp even a tiny kernel of what He desires of us. May we not settle with our present knowledge, but yearn for even greater wisdom from His heart.

For, when we finally begin to hear, we also truly see -- spiritual sight -- and declare: "I had heard about You before, but now I have seen with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance . . . God rescued me from the grave, and now my life is filled with light" (Job 42:5 and 33:28).

Let Us Pray

2008-08-26T13:26:00.004-05:00

"The evil you yourselves have done will be your punishment, your errors will be your judge: be certain then, and see that it is an evil and a bitter thing to give up the Lord your God, and no longer to be moved by fear of me, says the Lord, the Lord of armies." (Jeremiah 2:19)

There is a general theme running through the whole of my blogs on this site, and I tried to pull it together in the welcome paragraphs. But, as I have continued through Moments With The Savior, I have put together a composite of Ken Gire's prayers, which I feel really pulls it all together.

Now, I'm posting it so that you can use it in your day-to-day conversation with the Lord as you seek to surrender more fully to His purposes in your life.

Dear Lord Jesus,

I confess there are times when I have loved the darkness more than the light. Even as your child. And even now, there are times I walk along gray borders, flirting with the enticing shadows cast by the world. There have been times I have made this world not a brighter place but a darker one. By my thoughts. By my words. By my deeds. For all these shameful times I have been an unworthy subject, forgive me, I pray, O most worthy King.

It's inconceivable that anyone who's tasted of your goodness would drink from any other well. Yet I have. Forgive me all the ways I have prostituted my life. For how I have attracted attention to myself. For how I have compromised my character. For how I have cheapened my life and the lives of others.

Keep me ever aware that you are Lord. And ever aware that I am a sinful person. And in that knowledge keep me ever on my knees before you.

My debt is great, O Lord.

So much of my life has
been just that -- my life. My needs. My desires. My plans. My hopes. My dreams. My career. My car. My ministry. My time-off. I confess that my will has been the driving influence in so many of my thoughts, my actions, my conversations. Even when I pray, "my" has been on my lips so much more than "Thy." So often I come for you to bless my plans . . . instead of for me to bow to yours.

Please, Lord, take the selfishly possessive pronoun out of my life. And make it yours. Your life. Your plans. Your dreams. Your will be done on this earth.

Call me, Lord, out from a shallow faith near the shore, which requires no risks and offers no rewards. Call me to a deeper commitment to you. Help me to obey simply and solely "because you say so."

Renew in me, O Savior, a zeal like the Samaritan woman had -- a zeal to tell her friends, her acquaintances, and even strangers about you. Not a zeal to worship in this church or that. Not a zeal for theology. Not a zeal for causes. But a zeal for you, and only you.

A-men

Radical Relationships

2008-08-24T13:35:00.014-05:00

I had an inkling that God wasn't going to let me off the hook with one blog about conversation and behavior and relationships. Then, as I turned to my One-Year Bible and read the Psalm for today, my suspicion was confirmed:

"I will watch what I do and not sin in what I say . . ." (Psalm 39:1)

I have a number of notes jotted down from a recent quiet time. But, I have hesitated to write them because, while a number of my previous posts have been bold and potentially challenging, this latest word has hit so close to home that I have had a particularly hard time hearing and applying it myself.

So, as a matter of being faithful to what I hear God speaking, as I have committed myself to do, and as an effort to hold myself more accountable by making these words public, they are being recorded today. Here goes . . .

As we question our intentions in our speech and actions (are we seeking the favor of men or of God?), we uncover the truth about our very lives. We learn a lot about the purity of our faith and the sincerity of our devotion by dissecting our conversations and behaviors within our relationships.

Are we most concerned with shared passion and allegiance to Christ, or are we most concerned with feeling good and having fun. Do we care most that those we love grow and mature in their faith or do we care most that we have interesting talks and memorable experiences with them as often as we can?

Let me state that I truly believe that God intends to fill our lives with abundant joys and meaningful interactions. Moreover, the greatest pleasures and most significant moments of my life have been in the context of holy (Christ-centered) fellowship -- my wedding ceremony, the baptisms of my children, prayer meetings with brothers and sisters in Christ. In fact, those times seem to be a literal "taste of heaven."

Certainly, human relationships have the potential for great beauty and tremendous mutual enjoyment and can be mysterious representations of Christ's love and the fellowship savored by the Trinity. Marriage, as we know, is also specifically a visible reminder on earth of a heavenly reality of the union between Christ and the church.

But human relationships can also be stumbling blocks if our goal is merely the development and positive maintenance of those relationships.

You can live a good life (according to the world's standards) by having close relationships with friends and family -- shared interests, shared food, shared laughter, shared tears -- and all of it have nothing to do with Christ.

In such relationships, you make each other feel good, you stroke each other's egos and you may genuinely care for one another and seek to do good things for one another, but you don't go so far as to call one another to a higher standard in Christ. You don't serve to hold one another accountable or exhort one another to dig deeper into God.

Do you find that it is more comfortable and natural to share a meal and a few jokes with those in your closest circle than it is to share a Bible verse and a prayer? Is it more common and agreeable to talk of music and movies than to talk of Christ and the workings of His Spirit?

For many Christians, the answer to those questions is "yes," even when they are among fellow believers. Why are we divided and double-minded?

I have found at times in my own life relationships that standards are relaxed for the sake of the enjoyment of the relationships themselves -- to prevent the possibility of being bogged down in "Churchy" stuff because it ruins the atmosphere!

But at such times, "freedom" in Christ is used as an excuse to allow the children bought by His blood to settle and actually rejoice in each other more than in Him. We make each other idols, the "lovers less wild" that make us feel special and wanted, and we choose to find our identity and well-being in one another rather than in our Lord.

Christ calls for unity. I think part of that unity is within the individual through the meshing of our inward reality as "hidden with Christ" and our outward speech and behavior, particularly within the fellowship of believers.

What follows from that is true unity that develops among us as that meshing takes place in each of our lives and we encourage and support one another through the process.

Keep in mind and in heart that there is an earthly love that pats another on the back and says, "I'm okay, you're okay. What's for lunch?" Then there is a heavenly love that says, "We will never be okay without Christ. I will not settle for less than my entire life centered around Him. Will you?"

I want my relationships on earth to be filled with the latter, so that the benefits can be enjoyed for eternity.

Say As I Say

2008-08-23T09:03:00.005-05:00

"Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) are the undefiled (the upright, truly sincere, and blameless) in the way [of the revealed will of God], who walk (order their conduct and conversation) in the law of the Lord (the whole of God's revealed will). . . ." (Psalm 119:1).

We use the term walk so casually and vaguely to describe the life of the believer as he remains in fellowship with the Trinity throughout his life. We ask each other, "How is your walk with Christ these days?" But, what does that really mean?

We need something more observable than this non-descript way of thinking about our relationship to Christ as He works His power in and through us. There is a way to better grasp what is the calling on our lives and to help us recognize whether we are on the right track.

The psalmist says that believers should define and evaluate their spiritual walk by how they "order their conduct and conversation." When I read this verse recently, the word conversation nearly jumped off the page, and I was instantly convicted.

We need to strictly question whether in our conversation we have submitted our mouths, our minds and our hearts to be used by God for His glory.

"And let me not forget that even living water can be stagnated by indifference or tainted by the impurities I tolerate in my life" (Ken Gire).

One of the greatest impurities I personally tolerate is a desire to be accepted and respected more than I desire to seek that God be made known and honored through me. I seek in my conversation to be "someone" who is liked and who is approved by others. Yet, what does this gain me if I am not approved by my Father in heaven?

Paul asks . . . "Now am I trying to win the favor of men, or of God? Do I seek to please men? If I were still seeking popularity with men, I should not be a bond servant of Christ (the Messiah)" (Galatians 1:10).

Do you want to be a somebody of the world or a servant of Christ? You must choose. You cannot be both. If you choose the latter, your conversation must reflect your choice.

James tells us pointedly that if we get the external duties of our faith in order -- we go to church, teach Sunday School, read the Bible, give our tithe and say our daily prayers -- but we do not "bridle" our tongue, we deceive ourselves and our "service is worthless (futile, barren)" (1:26).

You must no longer thoughtlessly scatter your words in vain attempts to glorify yourself or find favor with those around you. Ask yourself: "Are you more motivated by the laughter and applause of those in your company or the smile and nod of your King?"

Bridling the tongue isn't just about avoiding obscenity. It isn't just about turning from negative complaining and discouraging speech. Certainly, you do need to eliminate these things from your conversation.

But at a deeper level, you must evaluate the very core of your conversations and what things you choose to speak about. Why do you open our mouth in the first place and how do you determine what words you will utter? Who gains the glory and recognition for what you say?

You must no longer choose your words by what is least offensive or least provocative or most tolerable or most humorous. You no longer have anything to prove or declare in your speech but that Christ came and died and was raised because "God so loved the world" (John 3:16).

You must count it all joy if because of how and what you speak you are misunderstood or rejected. It is no longer significant if someone else's company is preferred over yours, if you are found uninteresting or simple. You must rejoice solely that the Truth in your heart becomes Christ on your lips, even if it means you are despised and deserted.

Even if as you speak, there is no one waiting with ears to hear.

Listen to Jesus' words, paraphrased by Ken Gire, as He is our most perfect example of what is means to have an upright and blameless walk through this life:

"For I do not speak of my own accord . . . but the Father who sent me commanded me what to say and how to say it."

Are you surrendering your tongue to be used according to His will and for His renown and not your own? Try this . . .

How far can you make it through the day without using the word I? How successfully in your conversation can you exchange I with Christ? How does this radically change the quantity and quality of your speech, even of your thoughts?

What ripple effect does it have on your relationships and the whole of your life?

We Are Not Animals

2008-08-22T15:56:00.004-05:00

"Who is there among you who is wise and intelligent? Then let him by his noble living show forth his [good] works with the [unobtrusive] humility [which is the proper attribute] of true wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy (envy) and contention (rivalry, selfish ambition) in your hearts, do not pride yourselves on it and thus be in defiance of and false to the Truth. This [superficial] wisdom is not such as comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual (animal), even devilish (demoniacal)" (James 3:13-15).

Recently, my husband and I have been having a bit of difficulty with our two dogs. Our older dog is a mixed breed we adopted from the shelter seven years ago, and our younger dog, a cocker spaniel, joined our family only a few months ago after being abandoned by her previous owner in a nearby neighborhood.

All had been going relatively well between the two of them. But, it seems that dogs have an innate desire to establish heirarchy among themselves, and one dog must be dominant in the pecking order so that everyone understands who is boss.

Unfortunately, dominance had not been established between our two dogs, and the older one we call "Sammy" decided it was time to do so, which has resulted in a few intense wrestling matches for "Top Spot."

Pondering this animal behavior, I couldn't help but see the correlation between our human attempts to control and the tense battle for position among the canines in my household.

We can be so much like animals vying for leadership and domination, demanding that others submit to our wishes and whims. But Christ says that we are not to live according to the nature of the flesh -- the nature that orders the behavior of every other creature on earth.

Rather than seeking others to submit to us, we are to submit to God.

When we submit to the authority of Christ and allow the power of Christ to, by the Spirit, pervade our being, we walk and behave as sons and daughters of the Most High God -- not as mere men, but as "new" men.

This is our hope that we no longer have to be captive to the ways of the flesh.

We have the guarantee of the treasure of heaven, and we no longer have to be consumed with the desire to have the things and power of this world. Therefore, we can humbly count others before ourselves and not feel deprived or cheated of our place.

For what more can we gain than that which is already promised by and secured in Christ for us?

A Time for Tears

2008-08-22T13:42:00.005-05:00

"Blessed are you who weep . . ." (Luke 6:21)

Who are the blessed who shed tears? And why are they blessed. Certainly those who are in mourning are blessed that they are in a position to receive comfort from God. But, there is another kind of weeping that God seeks from us. It comes from the eyes of those who are in a place of transition from dark to light.

Those who are being sanctified will weep. They are being led on to holiness because God is faithful to those with a contrite heart who hunger and thirst for righteousness. And on the path to holiness, they become acutely aware of what they have yet to become, and they mourn their broken and sinful ways.

What is the progression toward perfection of those who are blessed according to Jesus?

First, one recognizes the emptiness offered by the world and admits to being "poor" . . . discontent with a superficial pursuit of pleasure and wealth or even with the daily grind of survival.

Those who are "poor" begin to "hunger and seek," (Luke 6:20-21) a search that is answered by God as He reveals Himself. Any seeker who receives a personal revelation of the perfectly righteous and just God will then see himself in the full and devastating light of His holiness.

Seeing his sin as black tar in the presence of the Holy God will awaken a seeker to his true state as a crucifier of Christ. He will "weep and sob" (21) for his iniquities, purging himself of the weight of guilt and shame and fully accepting the penance paid by his Savior.

Then free from his burden, the seeker who is now wholly redeemed turns from his old life and old ways to walk as a new man in Christ. As his outward life meshes with his inward identity in Christ, he is destined to be "hated, avoided and insulted" (22) by those he once considered friends, and even by strangers who see him -- as they saw Peter -- simply as a friend of the Galilean.

So, where are you in the progression? Have you blithely declared belief in Jesus without paying the price of tears? Have you spent time on your knees "in sackcloth and ashes," mourning the sacrifice required for your redemption?

How many who call themselves believers bypass the brokenness of a truly repentant heart? What salvation and freedom can come to one who refuses to suffer Truth?

Christ says, "woe to you" who are "filled and satiated," unwilling like the Pharisees to accept your need of the cleansing touch of God. You may be praised and adored by others in this life as a beacon of strength and character, but such was also true of "false prophets" (Luke 6:25-26).

What God wants are hearts that are humbled, contrite, penitent and bruised for their guilt and disobedience. He does not intend for us to be depressed, but He certainly desires that we recognize the depth of our wickedness when exposed to the light of holiness. To jump from darkness to joyful belief without pause for true brokenness over sin is an incomplete conversion experience.

We must be willing to feel very insignificant and unworthy in the presence of the Lord and to weep over our disloyalty as we have chased after so many idols and substitutions. "[Realize that you have been disloyal] wavering individuals with divided interests, and purify your hearts [of your spiritual adultery]" (James 4:7).

Are you willing to be truly broken so that you can be fully restored?

The Sword

2008-08-13T21:30:00.009-05:00

"If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you" (John 15:29).

An interesting thing happens when a Christian begins for the first time to really absorb and know Truth. A separation begins. The sword of Christ's words takes shape in experience and suddenly divides husband and wife, parent and child, brother and sister, even friend and friend.

"For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in law." (Matthew 10:34)

I've often struggled with some of the "words in red." Particularly those that push blatantly against some of our most idealistic, yet still worldly, notions. We like to believe that strengthening and prioritizing our family ties and community bonds is the essence of what it means to embrace the deep and important things of this life. So, what do you make of a Savior that tells every potential follower to "hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters" (Luke 14:26)?

In my own life, I can only say that I'm coming to understand that even the very best of our intentions can supercede Christ and lay claim to a place in our heart that solely belongs to Him. Though we believe our heart to be good, our desire is for the realization of the ideal -- the close-knit family, the interdependent community -- and no longer for relationship with our Lord.

We have traded our "glorious God for worthless idols" (Jeremiah 2:11). We substitute external choices for internal change.

Jesus turned over the tables in the temple because men had become preoccupied with the trappings of life. In their case, it was about making a penny. But it also applies to our preoccupation with any number of seemingly "good things." Jesus rebuked them all in a seething outpouring of frustration because "at some point the good life became more important than a good heart" (Ken Gire). And He rebukes us today for the very same reason.

Unfortunately, coming to a recognition of this Truth is only the beginning. Then begins the disciplined work of walking it out day by day. To no longer weigh the value of your life on anything but your identity in Christ. To willingly, at His command and for His glory, forfeit your titles, your bank accounts, your possessions, your lifestyle choices, your clout -- even your friends and family. To know your security in only one Truth: you are the Beloved.

And so you walk hand in hand with your God, with your eyes fixed into His and as you feel His touch and hear Him speak, you feel more alive and known and embraced than ever before. Yet, there is also a strange disconnect to the things and the people that once seemed like your lifeline. You have exchanged them, the counterfeits, for the authentic. It is the best choice, and it will take all of eternity to enjoy the benefits of it, but it is not an easy choice. It is not without pain. Not in this life.

"The man who resolutely turns from darkness to light will not have much popular support" (Elisabeth Elliot) -- not even within the church, because the church is often filled with many who are more interested in spectating faith than surrendering to it.

They scoff at one who claims to actually know God or find Truth.

After all, this is just a sweet song and dance that we do once a week, isn't it? It's makes us feel much closer to one another, of course, but we don't really think there's weight to this babble about "new man" and "miracles" and "heaven" . . . do we? Do you?

I do. And Elisabeth Elliot, in Discipline: The Glad Surrender, speaks frankly about what believers can hope for from their present company when God begins to invade their lives and transform their hearts, their minds and their souls.

"We merely tell the man who turns from the broad road to the narrow that he is hung up, not in touch with his feelings, a do-gooder, a party pooper, holier than thou -- any label that will exonerate the rest of us of the responsibility of being Christ-like. We pity his naivete, his narrowness, his unreality, never suspecting that there could be in our midst a few whose minds are set on things above because their lives are hid with Christ."

Jesus was crucified because of His Truth. "All because He lit a candle . . . and because of where He dared to shine it" (Ken Gire).

If you find yourself in a position to experience the divide caused by the sword of Christ, take heart! You have been counted worthy to suffer as Christ suffered. He was rejected and despised by the world. Should we expect anything less? Should we desire anything more?

Accountability III

2008-08-10T15:28:00.010-05:00

Why has the church cowered from Paul's charge? We are only half-honest when we explain away our disobedience with words like love and grace. So, we must bravely take a deeper look at our motives.

There is something other than "love" that makes the world go 'round. We are remiss not to acknowledge that we try desperately hard to love God and love money at the same time. The church is not immune to the desire to acquire.

However, it gets tricky when the longing for monetary resources within the church revolves around the ability to "save more souls" and more effectively "reach the lost." How can there be anything wrong with that?

Perhaps simply the fact that we are careful not to step on anybody's toes, to potentially sacrifice numbers in the congregation (i.e. dollars in the offering plate every Sunday) because that might jeopardize whether we can afford the brand new sanctuary or Sunday School wing expansion. After all, the vitality of our youth program depends on whether we have a full-court gym with a game room, right?

Yet God says, "[wealth] has been the stumbling block of their iniquity." (Ezekiel 7:19)

And because we ignore accountability and spiritual discipline to preserve membership rolls and yearly pledges, we welcome abominations into our fellowship "of self-will and unsubmissiveness." (14:4 AMP) It's a "You serve God your way, and I'll serve Him mine" mentality. And it's devouring the church from the inside out.

We become a household, as all are corrupted by a few, of false worshippers whom God cuts off and sets His face against (14:8). His revelation is withheld because those in our midst -- and by association we ourselves -- "have set up their idols in their hearts" (14:3) and seek to fulfill their personal desires above the will of God.

For those "who have eyes to see" and "ears to hear," God calls us "a rebellious house." (12:2)

Our selfishness has had a high price. For though we are commanded to purify our hearts and double-mindedness (James 4:8), we "profane (God's) secret treasure [the temple]; and robbers . . . enter into it and profane it." (Ezekiel 7:22)

Consider this . . .

Satan has successfully infiltrated the church, and he's done it with our permission.

Accountability II

2008-08-10T14:49:00.003-05:00

" . . . the people used to strengthen us are never those who sympathize with us."
-- Oswald Chambers

If we are to be true brothers and sisters of Christ in our fellowship, we must hold each other accountable to the standard of holiness set forth by Christ. And to do this, we will need something that supercedes self-confidence. We will need spirit-confidence through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, Who is our counselor and guide, to walk out the depth of Paul's charge in 1 Corinthians 3: "Is it not those inside [the church] upon whom you are to pass disciplinary judgment?"

For one day, we will "judge the [very] angels and pronounce opinion between right and wrong [for them]? How much more then [as to] matters pertaining to this world and of this life only!" (1 Corinthians 6:3) So, this world truly is the believer's training ground for an eternity of rule with Christ.

We can be so much like Moses, stuttering and stammering at the thought of the task that has been set before us. But God will not send someone else. He has chosen and commanded us. Those around us need us to be faithful, and even more desperately do we need them!

Accountability and, when necessary, spiritual discipline should be a natural part of the rhythm and dynamic of the fellowship. It leads to greater interdependence and promotes a more complete surrender of self will and self desire, along with an exponential growth in humility as we become vulnerable enough through the eyes of others to see ourselves as we truly are.

This interdependence is the foundation of true unity because it requires honesty with ourselves and with others. There can be no falsehood tolerated because it serves as a barrier to Christian fellowship. It was falsehood and duplicity that severed Judas from the fellowship among Christ and the Twelve.

Brotherhood/Sisterhood in Christ demands that we know each other for all that we are, not as we desire to appear, but also for all that we hope to become in Christ Who calls us into His perfection. As "iron sharpens iron" (Proverbs 27:17) we motivate and exhort one another to continue upward in our journey. We refuse to allow each other to stagnate or fall away.

It requires that we no longer keep a minimum distance from one another. There is no room for "personal space" in the fellowship. We must roll up our sleeves and get our hands dirty in the work of each others' lives.

We do not judge or admonish from afar as aloof observers. We reprove side by side as friends, as family. We do not go toe to toe as combatants, we go hand in hand as intimate allies. The goal is not for one to win over the other. The goal is for all to win . . . to fight the good fight, keep the faith and finish the race in victory to the glory of God!

Our obedience to the charge is a calling out of darkness the Light of Christ that we know has been placed in our brother or sister so that they may move from death to life. We serve as Ezekiel. We put sound and voice to the heart of God that speaks to the dry bones: "you shall live." (37:5)

Accountability

2008-08-09T12:30:00.006-05:00

"But now I write to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name [Christian] brother if he is known to be guilty of immorality or greed, or is an idolater [whose soul is devoted to any object that usurps the place of God], or is a person with a foul tongue [railing, abusing, reviling, slandering], or is a drunkard or a swindler or a robber. [No] you must not so much as eat with such a person." (1 Corinthians 5:11)

As you move forward in spiritual maturity, the closer you get to God, the more likely He will give you a revelation that is painful to bear and painful to obey.

Paul has clear and harsh words for the fellowship of believers. And how much wrong have we done and how corrupt have we become as a body because we refuse to obey this admonition.

"Do you not know that [just] a little leaven will ferment the whole lump?" or as the NLT says, "Don't you realize that if even one person" in the fellowship "is allowed to go on sinning, soon all will be affected?" (5:6)

The believers of Corinth have something in common with the modern church. They allowed members of their fellowship to claim Christ with their lips, yet continue to live out of wreckless and divided hearts. Somewhere along the way, everyone lost the nerve and courage to boldly love these members by confronting their wickedness and requiring repentance as a prerequisite for continued participation in the body.

Our gut reaction is usually to see our brothers and sisters wallowing in sinful ways, yet justify our silence as an act of grace and non-judgment. But Paul says without apology, "It certainly is your job to judge those inside the church." (5:12) When we turn a blind eye to anyone in our circle who "indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or a drunkard, or a swindler" (5:11), we walk in disobedience to God's charge.

Not only should we hold others accountable to their profession of faith and desire to put off the old man and put on the new, we should expect others to do the same for us. As we all need to be held in check as we work out our faith.

This is why God places such emphasis that we not forsake the fellowship (Hebrews 10:25). Left to our own devices, we're doomed. But the support of the fellowship is ineffective if we ignore Paul's words to the Corinthians because they are just as necessary for us.

Sadly, we've let a twisted definition of "grace" and a destructive silence keep us from obedience. We've allowed ourselves to believe we are generous, merciful, perhaps even humble, in this practice. So we puff out our chests and pat ourselves on the back -- proof of how we are anything but humble, and while we have been nice, tolerant and exceedingly patient, we have allowed the very Bride of Christ to be defiled.

Certainly, there is abundant grace for the sinner. And Paul explicitly states that we must refrain from judging those outside the body, the unbelievers, because to cease associating with every unbelieving sinner "you would have to leave this world." (5:10)

But a member of the fellowship who speaks out of both sides of his mouth . . . flippantly breaking God's commands while continuing to profess the Name of Christ is not to be tolerated or excused, especially not in the name of love.

True love does not embrace falsehood and dishonesty, but rather, as Paul makes clear just a little bit later in his letter, "rejoices whenever the truth wins out." (13:6)

And while we might want to argue the need for greater grace and mercy, we must be careful not to make a mockery of the grace and mercy that cost Jesus His blood and death on the cross.

The Voice

2008-08-08T17:10:00.002-05:00

“Let me hear Thee speaking in my heart. Let me get used to the sound of Thy Voice, that its tones may be familiar when the sounds of earth die away and the only sound will be the music of Thy speaking Voice. Amen.” (A.W. Tozer)

“We sleep and dream. We wake. We work. We remember and forget. We have fun and are depressed. And into the thick of it, or out of the thick of it, at moments of even the most humdrum of our days, God speaks.” (Frederick Buechner)

Many will likely say that I’m still an infant on the journey. So be it, as it is mostly true. Yet, after accepting Christ at age five, for most of 25 years, I’ve believed that the crux of my existence, the moment or compilation of moments that would please my Creator and crown my head with a sense of meaning, identity and accomplished purpose would revolve around whatever I might do with this body, mind, soul and, especially, this voice God granted me.

I have never been one to agonize over surrendering myself to Him. I have been blessed in that I recognized innately even in my earliest years that nothing in my life would ever amount to much without Him. And so, I have always wanted His way. At least in theory – and theory is much simpler and pleasant than reality.

I have, like all children of the fall, had to reckon the often slow and tedious death of my flesh, taking off the old man and putting on the new. Two steps forward and ten steps back. I have experienced and will continue to know the painful dynamic of the crucifixion of self until He completes the work begun in me in Glory.

Yet, even with so much work yet to be done, God in great love and mercy has granted me a place in His kingdom to not only offer praise and song to Him from my own heart, but also as a worship leader who draws others into His heart and His Presence.

His hand has guided me step by step to the place where I wanted so much to be and to belong and to serve. In this placing and through this granting, He has opened my spiritual eyes to see clearly and my ears to hear plainly that it is not my voice, nor any other part of me, that holds any significant gift, but His Voice surrounding me, upholding me and even speaking through me that makes all of the difference. And so it goes with all things since the dawning of created life . . . only “in Him we live and move and have our being” and only in Him is life at all (Acts 17:28).

Even more, He is teaching me that His Voice, which spoke out of the void everything that has ever existed, is beyond any shadow of doubt, the meaning, identity and purpose I have always desired. And it is not accomplished by me, but by Him who “works all things for good” (Romans 8:28).

And so I listen. And again and again, He speaks.

And, after a little prodding from a friend in my prayer group, I've chosen through this blog to share!

Always Be Prepared

2008-08-08T09:15:00.008-05:00

"But in your hearts, set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect . . ." (1 Peter 3:15)

Recently, when I least expected it, a situation came to me that demanded I give an answer for my faith. At first, I was terribly intimidated. The questions being posed came from someone I've always considered very intelligent, and I didn't feel equipped for the task. I certainly feared misrepresenting God in the process or creating confusion rather than bringing clarity to my friend.

But I was also just a lot like Moses. I doubted. My trust waned. I could feel the words rising to my lips, "But suppose they will not believe me or listen to my voice; suppose they say, 'The Lord has not appeared to you' . . . O Lord, please send someone else to do it" (Exodus 4:1, 13)

Yet God answered, "I will certainly be with you" (Exodus 3:12), and I knew I couldn't ask for more than that.

God promises us "words and wisdom" in the moment (Luke 21:14-15). And I found His promise to be beautifully and empoweringly true. That's not to say that everything I shared was received as I had hoped. But, I walked away with peace knowing God had spoken through me to His glory and according to His desire.

So, this entry simply includes excerpts from the "answer" I gave my friend . . .

Would you be willing to consider that God made the straightest path to Him, the one of Jesus, the simplest one and the most accessible for every human in every state, place, time and circumstance? Not a winding way that requires mental hurdles, but a straightforward way of placing yourself in stillness and surrender before Him. To "give up" striving and just be with Him, talk to Him and listen for Him to speak.

All He ever wanted from us is relationship (everything flows from that). I think we miss so much of what Christ taught because we want to make it more complicated and harder to attain than it actually is. The sweetest and most powerful aspect of Christ's life was His constant fellowship with His Daddy. . . and so He desired "that they may be one, just as we are one" (John 17:22).

We cloud Truth because we want it to seem grandiose in a way that makes us special for having figured it out, yet God came near and made the way one that we can grasp and apply even in our human imperfection because it is vital that we recognize that all the work is done by Him and for Him.

The beauty of it all is the mystery and wonder of how He would go to such great length to allow Himself to be found, to meet us and work through us and in us when we absolutely don't deserve and in no way can earn it.

I recognize the drive to “get life/faith right” in others as it is still dying a slow and painful death in me; the gnawing pressure to make the best choice, to define/control, to perform/achieve, to be counted intelligent and, therefore, worthy; seeking to define God by means of my personal choices, lifestyle preferences and religious creeds, rather than seeking to know Him and allow Him to define me without care to the end result of the shaping.

Hard to admit to what lies beneath layers of self-justification, but I'm conscious of how I'm perceived by others and whether I like and approve of how I perceive myself.

Yet, there is such freedom in "letting go" of that weight and of every idea, vision, notion of what I am meant to be, to do.

I can't secure myself or protect myself. I can't even breathe but that God provide the air. It is more desperate than being "utterly separated" from Him. I am "utterly helpless and hopeless" without Him. So I choose to "lose my life" (and every claim I think I have to the details, paths, people, things, choices, experiences and thoughts that it encompasses) so that Christ can become the "new man" in me (Colossians 3:9-10).

In acknowledging my own powerless state, I welcome Christ to come in the fullness of His power into my life and to work in me from the inside out. "Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me" (1 Corinthians 12:9).

It no longer matters to me whether I get it right -- there's really no such thing because God's method and manner from one to another will not be the same; He is infinitely creative in His ways of working in His children -- or what means He chooses to take me from earth to heaven; from darkness to light. "We've all been wrong! That's the great joke! There's no need to go on pretending one was right! After that we begin living" (C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce).

So, the form of the living is now in God's hands through the work of His Spirit in my flesh and blood, my heart and mind. There will be similarities for sure among the sons and daughters of Christ, most markedly the "burning heart" (Luke 24:32), but I'm not looking around to make comparisons or valuations. And I can safely trust, as a child does of her Father, that He "who began a good work" when He stirred my heart by His love and incredible sacrifice, will be faithful to "carry it on to completion" (Phillipians 1:6).

I simply, daily lay down my will; the imperfect for the Perfect. "It's not that I have already reached this goal or have already become perfect. But I keep pursuing it, hoping somehow to embrace it just as I have been embraced by the Messiah Jesus" (Philipians 3:12). I make mistakes, falter and fail and go back to my knees over and over and over.

The process is not expedient, and those with an eye for results and confirmation through externals will grow impatient through the seasons when evidence is hard to find. But I feel a deep kinship with the rest of the broken and struggling -- my fellow pilgrims on the journey. And I am certain that in all of us that yield to Him, the change that comes through the slow, persistent molding of the Father is eternal, because it is a life with a foundation that roots itself solely in Christ Who will never pass away.

Too Much Talk

2008-08-08T08:28:00.003-05:00

Maybe I'm not helping the situation by starting a blog. It seems counterproductive to argue against the prevalent "Christian chatter" of our day by seemingly adding more to it. Yet, that's what I feel called to do. So, I will. And perhaps what is written, even if by just a few, will be heard.

I look around me, listen to friends, notice bookstores devoted to and marketing specifically to Christians, and I become accutely aware how easy it is for us to talk about God. In a country that allows so much freedom, thank God, we can do all the talking we want without fear of persecution . . . certainly without fear of losing our lives like brothers and sisters of the faith across the world.

Because of our freedom, and all of the opportunities for thought and discussion -- in small group sessions and Sunday School classes, at lunch hour tables and church fellowships -- we quickly learn the art of contributing to the chatter. We can chime in the best and latest fad phrases. We are astute to offer a "Praise the Lord" or "I'll be praying for you" at opportune moments.

And we're becomingly increasingly skilled, although to no good purpose, at nitpicking each other's theologies. The debates are endless and ruthless.

But once again, despite all of the time and energy forfeited in the talk, we miss it. We miss Him!

"The disciple who honestly seeks to let God remold his mind will direct his energies not to sorting out the exceptions, loopholes or fine points of law, but to a total surrender of obedient love. Then, with his heart open to the Spirit of God, he will be in a position to learn wisdom."
-- Elisabeth Elliot

"For the Kingdom of God is not just fancy talk; it is living by God's power."
(1 Corinthians 4:20)

And probingly He asks . . .

"Which do you choose?" (1 Corinthians 4:21)

Wealthy Souls

2008-08-08T07:53:00.005-05:00

I want to share a word that God gave me sometime back. I was reading through the Beatitudes and asking Him to help me discern who are the "poor in spirit." After all, it is the promise they these are the ones who will inherit the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 5:3)

What He spoke to me in that time wasn't so much surprising as it was disheartening. So many Christians today are not necessarily wealthy according to their bank account (although as Americans we are rich in comparison with nearly all the rest of the world), but they are rich in their souls. They are content with their lives.

Keep in mind that this is not a holy contentment like that of Paul as he suffered in a jail cell. (Phillipians 4:11)

It is a contentment that becomes a wall between the believer and the full measure of the power of Christ. So many Christians consider their lives basically enjoyable and basically secure. And they consider themselves basically good. And they basically don't want things messed up by a God who refuses to fit inside a box.

What need do those Christians have of a radical Savior? If you do not see the direness of your situation, what desire do you possibly have for wanting out of it? How desperately will you seek a means of rescue and renewal?

The "poor in spirit" who recognize their great need for God are sometimes physically weak and financially downcast. After all, those two states of being generally quicken desperation. But, you don't have to be one of frugal means or bad health to be desperate for God.

What you need is an honest look in the mirror! And an honest and ruthless examination of your own heart.

Most professing Christians admit in words that they are in themselves wholly helpless and destitute, but to know and feel as an abiding and practical conviction that this is their true spiritual condition how few are able!
-- Charles Finney

This truth is not new. Finney wrote those words in 1844. The truth is that we cannot be passionate toward the One who sets us free if we are blind to the prison bars of sin and decay that hold us captive, if we cannot see the bondage of our own ego and will.

Oh, that God would by His grace grant us eyes to see ourselves as we truly are . . . that we may fall at His feet in unending gratitute and devotion. For, if we do come to Him in complete surrender, He is faithful to honor our desire.

The sweet caveat to all of this is that it doesn't end with the ugly recognition of our wicked self.

God is such a patient Father with whether we ever come into the fullness of the works He has for us. We get caught up in getting the externals right, and if we achieve that goal somewhat, we are content. But, God is after something eternally significant . . . the purity of our heart.

And, He longs for our hearts to be turned fully toward Him, so that He can begin to do all of the rest. Then, and only then, can we who finally admit that we are "heavy laden" (Matthew 11:28) begin to rest.

Once our surrender is made, and is maintained over and over by prayer and confession, we begin to walk in greater confidence. We can truly say, "I felt encouraged because the gracious hand of the Lord my God was on me." (Ezra 7:28b)

Qualification

2008-08-08T07:22:00.006-05:00

"So look at Apollos and me as mere servants of Christ, who have been put in charge of explaining God's secrets. Now a person who is put in charge as a manager must be faithful. What about me? Have I been faithful?

Well, it matters very little what you or anyone else thinks. I don't even trust my own judgment on this point. My conscience is clear, but that isn't what matters. It is the Lord Himself who will examine me and decide." (1 Corinthians 4:1-4)

There is always some timidation about putting yourself out there for God. The idea of being scrutinized for what you share isn't pleasant. But, God has given me peace for that and made it clear to me that I don't need to apologize or attempt to qualify myself for this work.

I know that by the blood shed by Christ, I have been given direct access to the Most High God, and I have met and continue to meet with Him in the quiet of my soul. It is in that place that He opens Himself up to me -- or rather opens me up to Himself.

It is so tempting to remain silent. (Wouldn't Satan like that!) After all, who am I that the God of heaven and earth would make known His ways to me? Yet, I know He does. And He will to you if you truly desire Him.

So, I write and share as an example of how He longs to pour Himself out over all of His children, into their hearts, minds and lives. And, while I have no earthly "credentials" for doing so, I follow after humble hearts of ages past who first had the courage and faith to tell the world of Truth and Light . . . the shepherds outside Bethlehem come to mind . . .

The first evangelists were shepherds. It was a task for which they had no skill, no special gift. No theological teaching or individual training. They had no organization to go before them and no literature to leave behind them.
What they had, all they had, was a divine encounter.
-- Ken Gire, Moments With The Savior

Regardless

2008-08-06T21:37:00.008-05:00

I'm realizing more and more that there's nothing new I can think or write. It's not really about being an original, or the first-ever to uncover certain mysteries of God and His Word. But I'm perfectly content with that.

Because the very things that strike me as so relevant and poignant at this stage in my walk of faith are truths that are very old and time-tested. I'm not discovering truth so much as I'm having Truth revealed to me, as it has been revealed to others for thousands of years. How incredible!

Yet again today, the Message is spoken loud and clear from heaven that the essence of faith is willingness to lay down everything of one's self in obedience to the call of God. His call to be in intimate fellowship, every moment of every day with His Beloved. From that inward fellowship should all things flow -- each sacrifice, each service, each spoken word. And in that order, the peace, joy and power of the Almighty reigns in the life of the believer; and blessing and glory and honor are given to God.

It was brought to light in a devotion on Mary's encounter with Gabriel when she learned she would bear the Christ. In the light of her amazing response . . . "May it be to me as you have said," our darkness in doubting God's promises and goodness is exposed. And we must come to grips with the truth that so much of who were are and what we are about is an effort to guard ourselves against the surrender Mary so swiftly and fully made.

We nod our head "yes" to a sermon and speak the word "yes" in prayer, but we live our lives as a resounding "no," or, at best, "not yet."

We're pitifully content with life as we have come to create it. And carefully and consciously we protect it against the mighty and unpredictable work of God, lest it become something we don't quite recognize anymore.

But we could learn so much from Mary in this brief exchange with an angel of heaven. Ken Gire, in Moments With The Savior, writes it best:

Her faith was courageous. We know that because her decision was
quick, and her obedience complete. She would submit to God. Regardless of the questions it would raise. Or the eyebrows. Regardless of the cost. Or the consequences. Regardless if it meant losing her reputation. Or the man she loved.
Even her very life.
And maybe, of all the favorable qualities this young woman had, maybe it was this "regardless" quality that made her most suited to the task of raising such a wonderful promise. For "regardless" had to be a quality that was instinctive if the promise were ever to grow up and reach fulfillment as Savior of the world.

Disciplines of the Heart

2008-08-06T16:31:00.007-05:00

So, there's another book I just acquired. The title caught my eye on the thrift store shelf, and for $.50, I couldn't really resist. Disciplines of the Heart (Ortlund, 1987). Amazingly, so much of what Mrs. Annie Ortlund has to say lines up beautifully with Mullholland (The Deeper Journey) and even A.W. Tozer (The Pursuit of God).

We are so often Christians in our actions, at least our attempts at good, and we can be especially convincing regarding the sincerity of our devotion to God on Sunday mornings. Unfortunately, and to our demise, we aren't Christians "between our ears," as Ortlund puts it.

We are living so much of our lives as "false religious selves," according to Mullholland. And, sadly, I agree. And I know that it has been true in my own life for years. A vain effort to do the things that I thought "looked like Christ" to anyone that might be watching. Yet, inwardly, regularly neglecting the very relationship from which any action must emerge. It's a religious version of an old cliche, but I really was "putting the cart before the horse."

Interestingly, I think at times, my heart really was in the right place in that I really did want to please God with my life. But, when it came down to daily decisions, behaviors, lifestyle and schedules, I couldn't give up control. I was still trying to make things happen on my own . . . ordering my own life on my own terms, rather than laying my life before Him in complete submission and humility -- trusting that He will always do in us and for us infinitely greater than we can ask and imagine.

It's so clear to me now that even the best acts, done with good intention, and the best choices, made in human wisdom or out of human philanthropy, fall short of glorifying God or sanctifying us because He is not given Center stage at the core of our very being. Simply put, we're acting out of our own will and understanding and that never brings honor to God. We're operating out of our ego and a desire to magnify ourselves (even if we can't or don't want to admit it), not as an outflow of the power and love of Christ in us.

We miss the point when we go about "doing" this thing or that thing and we completely ignore "being" with the Lover of our souls in quiet and deliberate surrender of every facet of our life -- allowing Him to reveal His will and His understanding to us, that we might walk according to His plan for us, rather than our own.

But, God in His grace, is opening my eyes to a better path, a path straight to His heart.

Rather than continue try to paraphrase, I'm just going to throw out some of the high points from Disciplines for you to consider:

"When we're itchy to 'do,' it's usually because we really don't believe, so we're trying to help God out."
"Now, the confusion comes because we don't see clearly that there are two sides in Christianity: His side and our side, His dazzling white and our black (Face it: in ourselves, in our own strength, we're black.) Most Christians mix the two -- some of God in their lives, some of themselves, some white, some black - -and come out grey."
"Unless you understand the mighty, eternal, efficient, sufficient work of God for you, you'll try to lend a hand and you'll mess up your life."
"'Current Christianity,' said someone, 'is seventy-three miles wide and half an inch deep.'"
"George Mueller used to say, 'It is my first business every morning to make sure that my heart is happy in God.'"
"Quit pretending. Quit striving. My dear child, quit trying to be some cocky little god competing with Me -- maybe worst of all, some cocky little religious god. Come down off your silly, rickety throne. Only my Father is worthy of a throne! Bow to Him only, and give Him all the glory, and let Him be all and do all, in you and for you!"

Books For Thought

2008-08-06T15:58:00.007-05:00

Last month, two books utterly transformed my understanding of my faith and walk with Christ . . . The Gift of Being Yourself : The Sacred Call to Self-Discovery (Benner, 2004) and The Deeper Journey (Mullholland, 2006). The long story short is to recognize that Christianity, in Western American culture specifically, we are absolutely engulfed in busy little external efforts to "be Christian," but we are devastatingly void of a vibrant internal connection to Christ. We try to work our faith from the outside in and in our own frail and failing human strength, rather than allowing the supernatural and unfailing Power of Christ through the Spirit to grow our faith from the inside out.

The first leads to exhaustion and frustration; the second leads to peace and victory.

This message has been echoed time and again to me over the past few months. And I'm certain God is calling, as He has been from the beginning, His Beloved -- Believers across the globe, but particularly in our country -- to "Rise up, my love, my fair one and come away" (Song of Solomon 2:10). Leave the busyness of "being a Christian" behind and come learn to be My Bride. Only when we are truly captivated by our Bridegroom, will the love that indwells us from His heart captivate the world around us.